The Flog – The Fabry Log

The More You Shop...

2012-01-30T09:31:00.000-07:00

Life happens at the most curious times. The more you shop, the more you want to … live.

I heard that on the loudspeaker of the store this weekend where I went with my daughter. The more you shop, the more you… Then the name of the store. This particular store had “given us” $30 in free money.

Really?

Was that really free, or a reward for purchasing X amount previously? And then banking we’d never use it. I don’t know, but it brought us back on the last day to use the “free money” to buy a dress.

So there I was, outside the girl’s dressing room, milling around like a man without a country.

“Additional cashiers to the Misses register, please,” someone said over the intercom. There were quite a few people lined up down at the Misses register. At first I thought they were occupying the place.

Young women flitted in and out of the dressing room as I awaited my youngest daughter. The last little puppy to wear a dress has gone from princess to PRINCESS before my eyes. Just last week she was playing with Breyer horses and dolls. Now she’s singing Adele songs and is as tall as her mother.

“Additional cashiers to the Misses register, please,” the person said again, with an edge to her voice. It almost felt like, “The more you people shop, the more it stresses me out!”

Fashion jeans. Flip flops. Ear rings. And all that perfume. To a chemically sensitive dad, this is like entering a twilight zone I will never escape. But for her, and for the love of $30 worth of “free money,” we were here.

I wanted to go to the intercom and say, “There’s cake and ice cream for all employees over at the Misses register.”

My daughter emerged with the dress in her hand and a smile. “It fits!” she said.

“How much?” I said.

“It’s marked down from $58 to $33.”

“Well, let’s head over to the Misses register and see what all the fuss is about.”

We ambled over and there were only a handful of people ahead of us. A manager turned a light on above a register and shook her head.

It’s funny how much life you can see while waiting. And the pink dream with ruffles and frills was a mere $4.35.

What an investment.

Fighting the Big Chocolate and Big Greeting Card Monopoly

2012-01-25T07:16:00.000-07:00

The Countdown to the 7 days of Valentines has begun. It’s January 25th and I’ve wracked my brain for gifts. I made a purchase online and it came in the mail, but alas she opened it and saw what I had chosen.

Season 6 of the Mary Tyler Moore show, the one with the “Chuckles Bites the Dust” episode. She apologized and seemed pretty excited about the gift. Maybe she’ll forget it by the time February 8 rolls around.

If you don’t know this game, it was enacted several years ago when the kids were little. I do 7 days of Valentines because, to be honest, one day just has too much pressure. If I spread my choices out over 7 days, I show her I’m thinking of her, I know her, I’m working on knowing her better, and what woman doesn’t want that kind of thought put into a holiday cooked up by Big Chocolate and Big greeting card? Can you imagine how much money they rake in during February? I think there should be some kind of governmental commission looking into this.

But I digress.

Each day I print the number of the day—on February 8 it will be, “Day 1 of the 7 days of Valentines.” Then, on another sheet, I print a clue as to what the present might be. For example, if she hadn’t opened the video, I might have said, “This will bring a smile and maybe a chuckle.” She would never have guessed it, but there would have been a huge smile when she saw the video.

This year I have a file on my desktop “Andrea presents 2012.” I have a list of ideas, things I come up with during the day that may work, others won’t. Some are simple, a poem, a song, an idea for a video. These don’t cost anything but my time and thought and some effort by my children. Others are gifts I may purchase. Small things. Nothing extravagant, but all thoughtful.

If you’re looking for a good project this Valentine’s Day, 7 days wouldn’t be a bad idea. Be creative. Think. And see what happens in your own heart as you head toward February 14.

The End

2012-01-20T06:43:00.000-07:00

Two of the best words in the English language are: The End. I wrote those yesterday after an odyssey of several months. I began a story called Borders of the Heart on 8/24, but that’s not true. I started it long before that in my head without even knowing it.

The process of writing is mysterious. I’ve been asked a few times to teach a class or give a seminar and I’ve done it for elementary, middle and high school classes. The kids who were there seemed to get something out of it, but to be honest, I don’t know how to teach writing. I know rules of grammar. Most of them, anyway. The important ones. I’ve read many books on writing and plotting and dialog and telling a story well, but I don’t really comprehend it. So I’ve held back on teaching and concentrated on doing. Maybe one day I will try.

As I tell you I’ve ended one story, another is beginning. Writing is something one must do constantly if one is to fund one’s family. So as I end the process of this story, one I finished last year is coming to the stage. I’m very excited about the story of Truman Wiley. I think it’s going to change some lives because I believe we all have a Truman in our life. And in some ways, we’re Truman.

I’ll tell you more about him soon, but if you want to see a book trailer for the book that is releasing, click here and go down to the video on the right.

The book is called Not In The Heart. It’s probably the most exciting, painful, honest, true story I’ve written for adults. True in the sense of capturing characters that are struggling greatly with the people and circumstances of their lives. Okay, I’ll stop.

Is there something you’ve been allowed to do in life that you feel inadequate to teach? Keep doing it. Maybe one day you’ll write about it.

Going Home For Christmas

2011-12-09T15:56:00.004-07:00

On our program of 12/9, I gave some thoughts about going home at Christmas as a Christian.

1. You were created by God as a unique human being. Don’t try to be Billy Graham, Ravi Zacharias, Josh McDowell, Erwin Lutzer or any other famous apologist.
2. You aren’t going to argue people into heaven.
3. Relax. It’s not all up to you. We each need to do our part, but ultimately the results are in God’s hands
4. GOING BACK AT CHRISTMAS IS AN ACT OF FAITH
5. Don’t be afraid to have fun at Christmas. Rejoice. Let your friends and family see that you have a life worth living.
6. You don’t have to be the holy spirit to your friends and family.
7. Questions are always better than statements.
8. Listen. Maybe this is the Christmas you really listen.
9. Jesus came into the mess of life. Don’t be afraid to go into the mess of your family.
10. Pray pray pray. What could happen to your gathering if you prayed for those individuals?
11. If someone makes a snide comment about your faith, don’t make it a big deal. Jesus said they would hate you because of him. Take it in stride and don’t make this about you.
12. What does love look like here?

On the night of his birth, love looked like a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.

When he was 12, love looked like submission to his mother and father.

When he was 30, love looked like being baptized and being in submission to the father.

Love sometimes drives out money changers.

It also touches lepers.

Love sometimes looks like weeping with others, as he did at Lazarus’ tomb.

Love sometimes looks like standing up to the religious zealots of the day who want to shackle people with their rules and regulations.

Love sometimes looks like forgiveness…for as they drove the nails in his feet and hands, he was forgiving them.

How will you be Jesus to those around you this Christmas?

But remember this: The success or failure of your trip back cannot be judged on the response of the people you’re trying to reach. Look at what happened to Jesus. In the limited perspective of humans, it looked like he failed many times. People ran him out of town, threw him out of the synagogue for his teaching. Crucified him. From the human standpoint people would consider that utter failure, but in God's economy, it was perfection. Jesus perfectly fulfilled God's plans--and when you follow his lead, it won't always seem like success.

Well, I’m praying you’ll have a Nicodemus moment with a friend or family member. But if you don’t have one, don’t be discouraged. Be faithful in what God asks you to do. And LEAVE the results up to him.

Behind Enemy Lines

2011-12-08T09:44:00.000-07:00

I don’t see a demon behind every rock or bush. But I am aware that we are living behind enemy lines. And the enemy does not want a message of hope and freedom to gain any traction.

Tuesday, after the program, I wasn’t feeling well and decided to take a nap. About six hours later I finally got up because I HAD TO GET UP, if you know what I mean. A flu bug, food poisoning—I don’t know, but I had little strength to get out of bed and go to work.

Which caused me to think of how fragile we really are. As Rich Mullins sang, we are not as strong as we think we are. Bacteria can fell us. We are weak, vulnerable creatures at best.

Others in the family faced trials. Last night, Andrea despaired. She’s worked so hard and feels like there’s very little to show for all that work.
That’s when I put things together. Despair can sometimes signal an attack. It makes you want to stop, retreat, or just give up. But an attack means you’re on to something good. An attack means you’re beating back the enemy of our souls.

Perhaps it’s because I’ve been talking about marriage and trying to give hope to those who have little. Yesterday, I spoke with Janet Parshall about the book, A Marriage Carol, and a woman named Chris called in tears, her marriage in tatters. She can’t trust her husband any longer because of a Facebook romance. How does she move forward?

I’m not sure I gave a good answer, but I spoke from the heart. I tried to point her to the one who is in the restoration business. The one who calls the dead back to life. Pray for Chris and her husband. Pray for those around you who are struggling with their marriages, especially church leaders. They are surely under attack.

I’m still not at full strength. Haven’t eaten anything in two days and have no desire to eat anything for the rest of my life. But I probably will because I know I need my strength to do whatever God calls me to do. May he give us the grace to live behind enemy lines today.

A Wreath Observed

2011-11-21T10:23:00.000-07:00

What’s the best Christmas present you can give your kids this year? In iPad? An e-reader?

The other day in the car, Colin asked if we could get a bigger Christmas tree. The one we chose is puny, evidently. I think he wants more room for presents.

That caused me to think about what I really want to give them. I love giving toys, trinkets, gadgets, and giz. I love giving books and gift cards and musical instruments. I love the feeling of watching them open a present and seeing the recognition on their faces that someone knows them, sees inside their souls well enough to get that DVD or pair of woolen socks.

But the truth is, the greatest gift I can give my children can’t be placed under a tree, no matter how big it is. The greatest gift I can give my family is a commitment to my marriage and the fortitude to work on that relationship no matter what.

On the cover of the book, A Marriage Carol, there is a Christmas wreath. And below that, the door knocker is in the shape of an engagement ring. These circles represent something that will last, something that has no end. The contents of the book, we hope, will encourage couples to continue the struggle, continue to fight for their marriage even if things seem bleak.

If your relationship is frosty, cold, or almost dead, all the trinkets, toys, and gadgets in the world will not make your kids happy. Their real happiness comes in the security they feel with two parents who are committed enough to each other not to quit, but to humble themselves and go to work.

If you’re married, give the gift that will keep giving to your children, your friends, everyone around you, and also yourself. Give the gift of commitment.

No wrapping paper or bow needed.

Books I've Been Given

2011-11-18T15:08:00.003-07:00

Here are the books we talked about on the program 11/18. These are books mentioned by listeners and me we have been given over the years that made a difference:

The Baxter Family Series by Karen Kingsbury
The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren
A Grief Observed by C.S. Lewis
Jesus Loved Them
Strength for the Journey by Joseph Stowell
Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers
Experiencing God by Henry Blackaby
Love must be tough by James Dobson
The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom
My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers.
Facedown by Matt Redman
This Present Darkness/Piercing the Darkness Frank Peretti
Trusting God Even When Life Hurts by Jerry Bridges.
The power of a praying wife by Stormie Omartian
The Fight, John White
The Effective Father by Gordon MacDonald
When Daddies Go to Heaven
Roget’s Thesaurus
Authentic Beauty by Leslie Ludy
The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom.
My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers.

How Much Will a Sand Dollar Buy?

2011-10-26T07:57:00.000-07:00

I was writing the story I’ve been given today, rolling along, mining the relationship of two different characters, when a memory that is not my own flew past and I followed.

He thought of the handful of times his family had even taken a vacation when he was little. He vowed that would change when he was married and had a family, but it hadn’t. What was learned early on stuck.

I wasn’t satisfied with his memory and I didn’t want to use something from my own experience. I wanted something fresh. Which took me back to Fripp Island in the summer of 1994, I think. Walking the beach, looking for Pat Conroy, and finding a sand dollar. I kept it as a memento of that stroll.

A memory of his brother at the beach flashed through his mind. The boy laughing at him for thinking he could spend a sand dollar at the local grocery.

That feels real to me. An older brother capturing a snapshot of naivety and laughing. Innocence, pure and unhindered by commerce and the rules of finance, bartering the heart and being crushed.

If I had that sand dollar today, I would not save it in a Zip-lock bag. I would invest it, spend it on something that will last.

Maybe that’s why the thought sparked. We all have sand dollars to invest, things unmade by human ingenuity, worthless rocks or wood or clay, but priceless still. Memories waiting to break through the laughter and tears and pain.

A rabbit trail from where I was going with the story, but a good one.

New Marriage Technology©

2011-10-15T05:50:00.002-07:00

Some of you know I write fiction and nonfiction in addition to my radio/voice work. I’m expanding my horizons and have begun secretly collaborating with a certain computer company to come up with new technology that will aid marriages.

Specifically, this device will help in the following cases:

1. I’ve fallen out of love with my spouse.

2. My spouse does things that irritate me and I can’t stand it anymore.

3. My spouse is sick.

4. My spouse is not the same person I married.

5. I’m not happy in my marriage and I want to be happy.

6. I love my spouse, but I’ve met someone else I love more.

7. Marriage is too hard, I want to quit.

8. I wasn't prepared for all the pain and hardship.

9. I have no hope for my marriage.

The program is fully functional and available in a beta version. Our hopes are that married people who are experiencing any of the nine situations above will be able to move forward together rather than splitting up.

The new device will be called…

Drum roll, flashing lights, music up…

** ** ** The iDo. ** ** **

Smaller than all of the other “i” devices, actually invisible, the iDo, with the patented “iCommit” operating system, will help an individual stay with their current marital situation so that true happiness might be achieved in the long-run.

Patterned after painstaking integrated systems software research, the iDo uses the experience of couples who have been married for decades who have said it was worth the struggle to stay together and work through differences rather than running from the marriage.

The iDo is the most innovative technological breakthrough in history and is being offered FREE for a limited time. Simply use the voice activation program at your marriage ceremony and mean it. And when you experience any of the nine situations above, reboot the iDo through verbal or non-verbal recommitment to the original voice command. (For maximum effectiveness, use the iCommit program with God prior to using the iDo with your spouse.)

The new iDo. Good for your marriage. Good for your heart. And it takes no space on your hard drive.

(For a fictional look at this technology in action, read A Marriage Carol , a Christmas story for anyone who's ever fallen out of love.)

Success

2011-10-11T14:23:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning thinking about success because my life FEELS so far from it. When I compare, I always lose, whether I pick a person who seems more or less successful than me because...well, they're not me.

Here's my new definition:

Success is becoming who you were created to be. It's not measured by externals, income, home size, newness of cars, awards or praise from others. It's not measured by my happiness or ease of life in the current situation. If I am allowing God to change and conform me every day into the image of his Son, then I am moving tward becoming who he created me to be. That is success.

My marriage, parenting, my work, play--all of it will be enhanced by this exercise of allowing God to change and mold me.

The better word for this, of course, is "faithful." Am I being faithful to the call of God on my life--to walk where he says to walk, to run when he bids me to follow. Will I have the kind of faith that shows God I really want him more than I want "things" or "an easy life?"

Success is not something I achieve, it's something I submit to.

Success is not having to know the plan and allowing God to work however he wants to work.

Success is realizing I don't have a better plan.

Success is surrender.

Uncle Johnny

2011-10-04T03:17:00.000-07:00

Today the third brother will be laid to rest in the fertile West Virginia soil he loved. We commit him to this rich, loamy harbor, meant for pumpkins seeds and cantaloupe that grew under his tender care. He is no stranger here.

The three brothers knew that death would come, that in the cycle of life there is this cold season when leaves turn and fall and trees become barren sentinels on hillsides. This is the way of the earth, the way of every farm. They did not know it would come for the three of them within the span of one year. Death does not give notice.

Unless the seed falls and dies, there is no life. Grass withers and flowers fade. This is the way of it. They knew that and lived in light of it.

These three did not seem old to us, those of us who watched them grow. Though hearing and eyesight and teeth failed, though joints ached and hearts slowed and blood pressure rose, they seemed able to spring from each setback, delay each fading moment that told us the end was near, or at least coming.

My memories of Uncle Johnny are vivid and encompass bowling lanes, foreign to me in childhood. I would never have learned to score a game had it not been for his instruction. He was more excited than I when I broke 100. I remember long, rubber boots up to the hip, and his tall, lanky body wading deep in the creek, into dark crevasses I would never go for fear of snakes or creatures that might lurk within those shadows. But he with seine in hand captured minnows and crawdads, wriggling and fighting as he brought them into the light, and in the capture provided bait for a day of fishing at the pond. Life for life, taking from one tributary to give to another.

I remember his voice at the front door in the evening, his unannounced arrival. I recall his delight at the offer from my mother of a piece of cake or pie, and long, humorous games of Rook. Uncle Johnny would instruct me, oh so carefully and subtly in the presence of my parents, our competitors, not to play a particular card in my hand if I happened to possess it. A wink and a nod and a smile could be interpreted many ways, however, and I was not always adept to his guidance. He taught me through his laughter that games are not always to be won. And that we learn more through losing, at times, than we do through winning.

There is one scene, a harrowing and fearful affair, when Uncle Johnny climbed aboard a mini-bike and took it for a ride, and in the end, it took him for one because he did not comprehend the brake/gas schema of the vehicle. He roared toward us, picking up speed as he raced downhill, toward the hickory nut tree and those gathered to watch. At first I thought it was funny, that look on his face, that white-knuckled fear and the way he bounced over the uneven terrain. Then, when he laid the bike down in the grass so hard the handles broke, the fear was mine, he had transferred it to me as he stood and smiled and walked away unscathed.

Of course he was not unscathed by life or loss. He had known hardship in his youth with his mother’s death. He had lived through lean days without much food and watched the Depression kick into full gear until it roared at him over the uneven terrain of his own life. I never connected any of this with his casual demeanor. He was simply Uncle Johnny. A tight-lipped character ambling through the story of our lives, smiling and enjoying the scenery.

And now the three of them are gone, John, Robert, and William Fabry. All three are planted firmly in the fertile soil of the hearts and memories of those who love them. They are not strangers here.

The Choice

2011-09-23T06:55:00.000-07:00

I’m struck anew by how simple the Christian life is, how simple God makes it for us, but how complex it feels. From the first response we have to God’s call, to the offer of freedom and love, we have to choose whether or not to believe. Does he mean it? Will he do what he says? Will I trust him?

Faith is not a blind leap. Faith is resting in what is true no matter what. No matter the feeling or experience. In the day-to-day series of mountains we climb, with all of the uncertainties and financial/relational/spiritual pressures, we have to choose again and again. Will I trust God? Will I believe in his faithfulness? Will I rely on myself? Will I find something/someone else to trust that makes me feel better?

Without faith it’s impossible to please God. With faith, placed correctly, it’s impossible not to please him. Whatever is on my horizon that presses me toward unbelief and worry is actually a potential opportunity to please the one who made me. And the bigger uncertainty, the more reliance on him I can have.

When I come to the end of myself I catch a glimpse of the beginning of God at work. Today I choose to believe not in myself, but in him.

small spaces

2011-09-19T04:27:00.000-07:00

I met a writer last Friday, Ann Voskamp, who has a very successful book, One Thousand Gifts. There is a reason it is successful, and I don’t think it’s because someone has branded her or she has a Facebook account or that the cover of the book is elegant. God honors content. He shows himself best in the simple beauty of truth told well.

Here is what she told me that most encouraged me. During the interview she related that her husband doesn’t read much other than the local farm newspaper and his Bible. But he built her a cabin on the edge of a cornfield. It’s a 10X10 space where she comes empty each evening and pours out her heart on the page.

I’m encouraged by that because the space where I do what I do is small, on the edge of the desert, at the back of the home we’re renting, in a place that is not holy or glitzy or glamorous. It’s plain and mean and hot when the sun beats against the outer wall.

Yet, in this space, I ask God to inhabit every day. And he does, because he has made his dwelling in me. Unbelievable. That God would become a man, the infinite in a small space. That God himself would suffer for me, all powerful Creator, bearing my guilt on two crossed beams.

I think God delights in using our small spaces. Small tasks. Small minds. When God looks our way he does not see how small the space, he only sees the possibility of what might happen in that space. The little boy’s lunch that fed a few thousand people. That’s what I have at my disposal every day.

So I’m trying, again, not to look at the small space I have been given, but at the big God who wants to inhabit it.

May Jesus inhabit the small spaces of your life today.

My Mind, The Mine

2011-09-01T03:49:00.000-07:00

My mind is a cavern waiting to be mined, with treasures in darkness.

My mind is my friend, but once it is stirred, it waits like a specter and will not relent.

I’m working on a new story. In the middle of the night I awaken, as I have these past few months, put on my hat with the flashlight duct-taped to it, and wander to the kitchen and retrieve the instruments I will use to call forth blood from my son to see where his blood sugars stand. If a test is all I have to do, I can wander back to bed and perhaps fall asleep. But more often than not, my mind begins to whir as I fumble for a needle and the insulin that will stabilize him. Or a spoonful of organic honey to raise him in his sleep, as happened today.

And it was in that single dot of light coming from my hat that helped me make the connection between my grandfather and my own life today. My grandfather was ten years old when D.L. Moody died. He was born in the old country, in what was then Austria-Hungary, where the seeds of world conflict were first sown.

When he came to America, to avoid that conflict, he worked his way south and wound up in the hills of West Virginia, or better described, inside the hills. He was a coal miner. My father was born in a little town called Omar, WV in 1920. His father was 31 at the time. I can imagine, with a newborn baby, what life might have been like to awaken on some cold, West Virginia morning and strap on his headlamp and walk to the mine and descend and dig in the darkness of the earth for coal. Digging in darkness and paid pennies for the company.

My grandfather was too smart to remain a coal miner. He saw what it could do to a man, to a family, the hardscrabble life wed to the company and the store. So he traveled north and settled in the town where I would eventually be born when my father was 41.

And that is where my own seeds were sown. Every man has a conflict, a retinue of discord that he must grasp and use each day to propel himself forward. This is the momentum of life, a gift and yet a curse. Some weathered tool he uses to strike the earth and pull stones and gems and ballast. My grandfather worked hard in the earth. I do not toil as he did, but I work at a different mine.

***

I’ve been working on a new story for more than a week. Usually the first
fourteen days are easy and fun. Daunting at first and filled with doubt that I can keep all the plot plates spinning, I dive in, propelled by the hook of the beginning, that twist of life that I believe will grab readers and pull them into the mine of the story. This beginning process propels me for at least 100 pages. And then the fun stops and the hard work of Act 2 begins. The weather gets colder. It starts to rain and the leaves fall and bones ache early in the morning. This is where the resolve is tested. It’s where you learn the most about your characters and the depth of your story. The light begins to shine on your own soul here.

I tried going back to bed at 2:45. I really did. I thought, if my grandfather had the chance to crawl back to bed instead of trudging through mud into that mine, he would have. But my mind wouldn’t still. So I prayed. I thanked God that I was not a miner, that I did not work in a job that physically taxed me. I thanked him for giving me meaningful work each day that made sense to me and perhaps encourages others. And then I prayed for my family and friends who are going through difficulty. I thought this would allow me to sleep, but it did not.

So I turned on the computer and walked the few steps to the mineshaft that is my office, a long, cramped room filled with books and radio equipment and towels and covers hanging that knock down the noise. I came here to meet my characters again, to find out what will happen on page 60. To hear their voices and smell the musty air they breathe driving in an old truck through the desert, hoping the man who is hunting them will not find them. These are people without defined faces and pasts who I am trying to call forth from the darkness, and I will not find them or paint them if I am not with them. This is a good story, perhaps my best, and I am praying their tale will make readers squirm and laugh and cry and want to run into the arms of God.

My mind is a cavern waiting to be mined, with treasures in darkness.

My mind is my friend, but once it is stirred, it waits like a specter and will not relent.

And I am grateful for the one who calls me from sleep to help my son, and in doing so, help myself.

Campaign

2011-08-19T15:37:00.000-07:00

As reported on Chris Fabry Live today, 8/19, Brandon Fabry ran for President of his fifth grade class. We waited all day with anxious anticipation to hear the voting results.

As predicted by this pollster, demographics torpedoed the candidacy of the Brandon/Max ticket. The new president is Kara along with VP Jadyn. They were in a dead heat with Molly and Peter. With a predominantly female class make-up, I told Brandon that he had an uphill climb.

"Girls will always vote for girls, unless you're extraordinarly cute," I said. I suggested he consider wearing a Justin Bieber mask but he decided against it.

Brandon reports that he will fully support the new administration and do everything he can to make the president's job easier. Such is the nature of the political world. It is a harsh, cruel profession. But I say the victor is the one who participates and never gives up, as long as his platform is to make the vinegar in the classroom smell better.

Eulogy

2011-08-17T10:35:00.001-07:00

I told some family members that I would write down what I said about my father on the day of the funeral. This is close, without the emotion. I hope it encourages you. Sorry it is a bit long, but it's from the heart.

You know what my father would say about this gathering?

Horse collar. Shoodley-poot. Poodledog and apple butter. Let’s get this show on the road.

These are some of his Fabryisms. We would ask him, “How you doin’, Daddy?” He would respond, “I’m no problem.”

He would say about my mother today, “She’s prettier than a speckled pup.”

My brothers elected me to speak today and told me if I didn’t, they’d beat me up. I’ve been pushed from the porch too many times not to believe them. But it’s dangerous to give me an open microphone, an audience, and not give me a time limit.

In the obituary we put together for my father, we highlighted three things that seemed to form the structure of his life. Farming, Family, and Faith.

And my father was probably the most “integrated” man I ever knew. Integrated in the sense that he was the same person he was on the back of the tractor as he was sitting in the pew. He was the same wherever he went, whoever he met. I long to be that type of person.

My family was not able to be here but my children wrote some things they’ll never forget about their Pawpaw.

The joy he found in his garden.
Playing croquet with him.
Feeding us grapefruit.
When he talked and thought no one was listening he would start talking to the wall.
Mommadee Mommadee Murder Buck—hitting us on the back while he said those words.
He always showed me his garden and taught me to identify the trees.

I remember how he used to come home from work, eat a bite of dinner, and go out and work on the farm in the field or with the cattle. It seemed to give him energy to work, to mow, to plow, to be up on the hill. But in the evening, as the sun slipped behind the hill, he would join me in the front yard and put on his old glove and we’d toss the ball back and forth, ball in hand, throwing, ball in glove, ball in hand and back again. It was how he said he loved me, other than when he said, “Love every bone in your body.” We’d listen to the Cincinnati Reds together on the radio and watch the lightning bugs ascend. He’d smoke his pipe. Those are the tender memories of my childhood.

Some people have a problem with viewing God as their father because theirs was abusive or stern or vindictive and mean. I’ve never had that problem. I’ll be in Bible studies with other men who will talk about their fathers as drunken men who knocked them around the house. I sympathize with them, but I cannot relate.

Tell me God is loving. I believe. Tell me he is kind and compassionate. I understand. Tell me God has my best interests at heart. I’ve seen that in action.

When Jesus taught his followers to speak to God as “Abba,” their heavenly “Daddy,” he was talking about a radical concept. No one had ever approached God this way. But that’s what I’ve experienced.

One of the great triumphs of my life came in answering the phone as a child. We had one phone that hung on the kitchen wall like an anvil. When it rang, I usually got there first and answered. “Hello?”

Until about the age of 13, I invariably got this response. “Kat?” Or, “Kathryn?”

“No,” I would say dejectedly. “This is Chris.”

“Oh Chris, I’m sorry.”

But then the day came when the phone rang, I ran, and answered.
“Robert?”

That was a good day. To be mistaken for my father’s voice was a triumph.

My father was a tactile, hands on person. I’m convinced his love language was physical touch. You couldn’t be around him without him touching your shoulder or giving you a hug. I remember early on holding his hand as we went to the feed store.

“Who you got with you today, Robert?” the man at the counter would say.

“This is my helper.”

It felt good to be a helper, though as it turned out, I wasn’t much of a help around the farm because I was different than my father. I did not have the closeness to the ground that he had. I tried, I really tried. In fact, I almost shot my foot off going squirrel hunting with him once. And I think he knew, intuitively, that I was not meant for the farm.

When Johnny came along and he went into the military, my dad was proud. He loved his country and to have a son serve made him beam.

Then Dave came along and studied chemistry and worked in a lab with petroleum. Having worked at a chemical plant for 30+ years, he could grasp that. And he was proud.

And then I came along a few years later. I was not a farmer. I was not military. I couldn’t understand chemistry and calculus. I could barely understand consumer math. Instead, I wrote songs, talked on the CB radio, dressup our dog and took pictures (canine pornography), and memorized lines from Marx Brothers movies. I was the three-headed monstrosity. I was foreign to him. But even though he couldn’t understand me, even though I was so different, he loved me.

I remember we used to watch TV programs together and he would cry at the Star Spangled Banner and schmaltzy commercials that touched him. One episode of The Walton’s sticks out. The father was away at Christmas and all the kids were nervous about whether they would get presents. Finally, the father shows up and for his eldest, he gives him a writing tablet. It’s the gift that finally tells the son it’s okay to be a writer, it’s okay to be who he was.

There’s a scripture often quoted from Proverbs. Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it. Some take that to mean that you need to guide a child in the path you think he should take. But my father knew better. Though he didn’t understand the path, he trained in the way I should go. And I’ll always be grateful.

On Sunday mornings, if he wasn’t working at the plant, he would wake me early and ask if I wanted to go for a walk on the hill. This was partly our alone time and partly his way of helping me lose weight. I was 15 before I knew Little Debbie wasn’t related to us. He would unleash Shep, our old collie, grab his walking stick, and up the hill we’d go. Along the way he would show plants, trees, flora and fauna, just like my children said.
That easy walk is what I compare his faith to. There was a time when he dutifully served God, where he went to church and did things FOR God, to make God pleased with him, happy with his efforts.

Then came an awakening to the grace and mercy of God. I can still remember him getting an NIV Bible—we found it the other day. From Ephesians on it’s totally gone, just worn out. And I remember him devouring Knowing God by J.I. Packer. My father encountered the truth that we don’t earn heaven or favor, but God’s grace is received. Forgiveness is not merited, it is offered freely to all who ask. Righteousness is not earned or worked for like a well-tilled garden, it is imputed. By His stripes we are healed.
So there became this long, easy gait of a man forgiven and made new because of the work of Jesus on his behalf. And every day was a walk with God. Every seed planted, every row hoed, every ear shucked, every cow fed, every boy’s hair cut.

I remember the haircuts. I dreaded it like Sunday evening church. This was the late 60s, early 70s when crew cuts were anathema. I wanted long, flowing hair. He would drag us down to the basement and sit us on that red, rickety chair and proceed to lop off every bit of hair we had. In later years, he switched from the crew cut or buzz to a little longer style, and I remember him using his hands instead of a comb to get my hair to stand up straight. His hand going back on my head felt like a blessing.

(I also remember when Dave and Johnny told me about the jugular vein and how, if it were cut, you would die within minutes. And my father nicked my ear one day and I saw blood and ran screaming from the basement to say goodbye to my mother, thinking my jugular had been cut.)

My father’s life, his work, his devotion to God all came from a heart of thanksgiving—not out of obligation. And my dad’s faith grew deeper as the incline increased. The steep, uphill struggle yielded a deeper life for him.

A week or so before he died, one of his care-givers asked, “Mr. Fabry, if you could have anything on this earth, anything at all, what would you want?”

According to my mother, he paused and looked off, contemplating the question, struggling to process the information. Finally he answered, “Jesus, my Savior.”

Those were the last words he spoke. The next few days were spent being loved well by his wife of 61 years, who was committed to helping the love of her life spend his last days in the house he had built with his own hands. His daughter-in-law was there to administer the complicated mix of medicine that would keep him pain free and stay up with him and comfort him and speak so kindly to him even though he didn’t respond. And David was there in the bed beside him, watching, waiting, grieving, and trying to make his last days more comfortable.

I like to think that last Thursday, my father got up early, before any of us could tell him to stay in bed. And he said to himself, “Let’s get this show on the road!” He grabbed his walking stick, but realized he didn’t need it. His knee that had given him such problems felt better than it had ever felt before.

And he headed alone for his final walk. He walked all the way to the back fence on the hill and it felt like he could walk forever. And he can.
He’s not coming back. And we love him too much to ask him to. But we will meet again. This is our sure hope in Christ.

Tribute

2011-08-09T10:51:00.000-07:00

On today's Chris Fabry Live, Hour 2, I'm going to pay tribute to my father and I'm hoping many will be encouraged by his life and struggles. People at the funeral said they never knew what he went through and that his story was similar to their family's journey.

If you would like to see the video my sister-in-law, Kim, put together of his life and the beautiful job the funeral home did, click here. You'll see photos of my brothers and me and two old love birds, married more than 61 years.

Here's a photo of my brothers and me with my mother, Kathryn (center), and his surviving sister, Elizabeth.

Comfort in Grief

2011-08-01T07:42:00.000-07:00

Death seems like such a formidable foe. Big and scary and final. It feels very much like the end in so many ways.

But it's not. I know that from what God has revealed to us. I know it in my heart. But knowing that in your head is the problem because what we see isn't the total truth. Yes, death is an end. It's separation. It's painful.

But it's also a beginning.

We're going through that with my father now. At 91, his mind and body are failing. It could be days. It could be weeks. But the end is near. And it hurts. Death seems to be all around us. I have a feeling that's not going to change. The illusion is that life just continues as it is and as it has been, but we're smacked with reality from time to time.

I was searching for some encouragement and received this email from a listener. I thought it might encourage you. If you're going through grief and trying to understand, this parent's perspective says it all.

Chris,

My son, CPL Frank R. Gross, was killed in action in Afghanistan July 16. The Humvee he was riding in hit an IED. While it has been difficult for this family, I am thankful to God for the 25 years that we enjoyed with our son. He fulfilled all of the qualifications of a good son, and he did that well.

Last night, I struggled with some differing thoughts...I have friends who believe that my son's life was cut short, that the enemy took his life....however, I opened my Bible....the place I turn to for words of truth...a place where God reveals Himself to me and draws me to Him...and read these precious words: Ps 139:13 "For You created my inmost being, You knit me together in my mother's womb.......16 All the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be.", and then I turned to Ps 31:14-15 "But I trust in You, O Lord, I say, "You are my God" 15 My times are in Your hands...".

I believe in and trust in the sovereignty of God, I have hope and faith that I will one day join my son and all those who have gone on before me who trusted their lives to God.

I enjoy listening to your program on 91.1 Tampa Bay, FL.

Toni Gross

The attached photo above (lone soldier) is of Frank as he graduated from basic training, Ft. Benning, GA, July 2010. My daughter and I picked that one.

The other(the final mission) is one that my son created just before he died. All of his artwork up until this piece had been gloomy, but this was the first and last one that he did that wasn't....perhaps he knew in his spirit that he would be going home soon?

Military Couple

2011-07-19T11:11:00.002-07:00

I spoke today with the wife of a military member in Georgia whose husband is in big trouble. Their military housing, they believe, is moldy. They have symptoms consistent with mold exposure. But his superior officer has ordered him to keep quiet about the mold and move his family back into the housing unit.

I won't go into more detail than that, but you can see the pickle this military man is in. He's sworn to obey his commanding officer and serve his country. But when his family's health is at risk when given that order, what does he do?

On Thursday, there will be a court proceeding. Would you pray for wisdom and clarity and that the truth of this situation would come out?

2nd Day

2011-07-19T08:23:00.000-07:00

All three puppies came home tired at the end of the day, but made it through the entire day at school. There was some consternation about not having the right supply list, but that was remedied last night. Colin's blood sugar ran higher all day, hopefully because of the excitement and stress and not any chemical reactions from the new environment. Today his numbers were much better.

Andrea drove away alone today with them and she had her laptop with her. I'm hoping she'll get some alone time and some tea. That type of morning has been non-existent for a few years.

Thanks for keeping up with the progress of the kids!
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Apples on the Porch

2011-07-18T07:41:00.000-07:00

It’s difficult to not live in the past. It’s tough to just look at today and not put a template of fear over your life.

My mind is spinning with memories from years ago when the first day of School was in August and fall was in the air in Colorado. Andrea would draw apples with chalk on our front porch, symbolizing the kids going back to school. Those were exciting days filled with new clothes and backpacks and anticipation of the year ahead. In 2008 those days came crashing to a close.

Today, July 18, 2011, the kids go back to school for the first time since 2008. They’ve been taught at home in our safe environment for the past two years. Safe in the sense of toxins, chemicals, and odors from the outside world. We created as perfect a bubble as we could.

Last night, Andrea drew three apples on the front porch. These are desert apples. It’s not even close to fall. It was above 100 degrees yesterday. But the feeling of anticipation and excitement is the same. The kids were up before 6 AM, getting ready, putting on their new clothes. Getting backpacks prepared.

I do not know if this will last. They may come home this afternoon with bloody noses. We’ve had an air purifier in the classrooms over the weekend and have done everything humanly possible to prepare the teachers and administration. Now we take a step into the unknown again.

There’s something about the 18th that feels right. Andrea and I were engaged on the 18th. We broke up on the 18th. We were married on the 18th. None of our children have been born on the 18th, but I think that’s an anomaly. Through our dating and married years, pivotal things happen on the 18th. An offer on a house. A book contract signed. Some milestone with the children. The 18th has held a special place for us, and it does so today.

At the same time I look at this beginning, this step of faith, I think of my father and a childhood friend who are slipping from our lives. There is no talk of going back to school for my friend, Mike, who is now in hospice. There is only talk of a pain-free life, that he is resting comfortably. How can life go on when his family is in such pain? And my father has come out of another hospitalization, confused, unsure of where home is.

Perhaps there are apples in each of our lives, drawn with chalk on the front porch of our lives, signaling something new, something good that feels terribly wrong. Seeing those drawings takes faith. Stepping across them takes will-power.

I don’t think we’re stepping across them alone.

Yay for Billy Allman

2011-07-12T09:15:00.000-07:00

It’s time to give you a final update on Almost Heaven. Many of you prayed for this book as it was being released. I wanted to let you know some good news. First, some anecdotal evidence that the book is having an impact. Here is a little from an e-mail I received yesterday, 7/11.

Dear Chris,

This is my last day of our family vacation. I took your book, Almost Heaven, with me. I thought it would be a fun read. In some ways it was, but more importantly, God used it in his process of healing my soul, which took me by surprise.

As I was reading the chapters of Billy's last weekend with his mom before going to the nursing home, I'm at the pool weeping and drying my eyes with my beach towel. I could relate to so many of his feelings. I loved when the puppy barfed on his mom and you wrote, "perfect end to a perfect day." I was grieving my parents' failing health along with Billy.

Then, towards the end you bring up Billy's past issue and his need for counseling. God was speaking to me about how, as painful as (our trials) have been, they are part of a healing process that he is doing in me. I don't understand the process, Chris. I don't understand the role of tears and pain and grief in soul healing. Somehow God uses it and he used your book this week in that mysterious process.

That letter did a lot to encourage me, and it confirms my suspicion that there was more in those pages than just me trying to tell a story. When I first suggested the plot of Almost Heaven to my editor, Karen Watson, she took a deep breath. She said she trusted me with the subject and that it would come out redemptive and healing, even though it was about an obscure man and the angel who watches him. I think she was right, and those who prayed and read were part of that process.

If you didn’t hear, Almost Heaven won best fiction for the past year by the Evangelical Christian Publishers Association. And last night, it won the Christy Award for Stand Alone novel. I’m excited for Billy, that a little of his heart has been told. I’m excited that you were part of this. Thank you.

Chris Fabry

P.S. I have a novella coming out this Christmas with Dr. Gary Chapman titled “A Marriage Carol.” My prayer for that book is that the story will help save a marriage. And in February, my next big novel, the one I think will capture a lot of attention, will be released. It’s called “Not in the Heart.” More about that in the coming months.

4th of July Picnic

2011-07-05T17:00:00.001-07:00

Brandon Fabry shows perfect form in the bean bag toss. Chris Fabry stands behind the target, watching in anxious anticipation, bedecked with his favorite Ohio State hat he bought at Walmart for $5. Andrea Fabry, who blew away the competition, reacts to the action with one arm akimbo, the other in a clear signal to her partner, illegal in most states. Not pictured, Colin Fabry, blocked by Chris Fabry.

Background courtesy of Southern Arizona and the Lindsey family farm. Cow pies optional.

50 Things I’ve Learned in 50 years

2011-07-01T09:40:00.001-07:00

1. Failure is frightening, success can be terrifying. Both will try to stop you from doing what you were called to do.

2. Love is patient, love is kind, but it’s also messy and really hard. A good man will let it change him.

3. A free phone, a free month, and a free horse are never free.

4. It doesn’t take much to encourage someone. And it takes even less to discourage them.

5. It’s a mistake to base what you do on your worst critic, your biggest fan, or a focus group. Be who you were made to be, not who someone thinks you should be.

6. There are three things that are too wonderful for me, four that I do not understand: A good dog, a loving wife, children who obey, and an honest mechanic.

7. The goal of my life is not perfection, it’s participation.

8. Love means never having to admit that your wife was wrong.

9. Those who suck on the straw of life get a lot more out of it than those who blow into it.

10. Sometimes the worst thing I could have is to get what I want.

11. If you have to buy the protection plan, don’t buy it.

12. Drive the speed limit and you’ll never worry about how much the speeding ticket is going to cost.

13. Struggle is not the sign of illness or death, it’s a sign of life.

14. Left to itself, the human heart will always settle for something less than that which will truly satisfy.

15. There is no problem, no diagnosis, no hurt or pain or mountain that is bigger than God.

16. Invest your time, don’t just spend it. Saying no to something will allow you to say yes to something later.

17. Faith is not understanding everything God is doing. Faith is trusting that what he is doing is good and will result in glory to him.

18. Love is a lot like living in the desert. There will be times of rain and cool. But most of the time it’s hot and your garbage stinks.

19. Life is not about reaching my dreams and goals, it’s about discovering God’s plan and purpose.

20. Time with your children is never wasted.

21. Loss and pain force you to choose between bitter and better.

22. When I work to control my life, I get further behind in following Jesus.

23. The key to the abundant life is forgiveness. It’s a choice to make every day.

24. It’s a good thing to cry. It shows you’re human and connected.

25. It’s okay to let people down, make mistakes, and fail because it proves you’re trying. Life is not about getting everything right.

26. Loving someone doesn’t always mean you make them happy. And being loved doesn’t always mean that you’re happy.

27. God doesn’t need my ability. He desires availability. My greatest mission is submission to him.

28. God doesn’t want to resurface my life and make it smoother. He wants to dig it up, make it new, and change directions.

29. Money and possessions are like weeds in life’s garden. Give as much away as you can.

30. Sometimes progress looks like death.

31. Humility and self-deprecation are miles apart.

32. If Jesus never hurried, I don’t have to.

33. Making your kids do what is right is not parenting. Training them to choose what is right is.

34. Doctors don’t know everything and neither do I.

35. I have no relatives in England or Africa who have died and left me money.

36. Beware of these three words, spoken to you on the street, after dark. “Excuse me, sir?”

37. Invest in people not things.

38. A coward uses his wife as the reason for making a decision.

39. Monogamy is the most sexy thing you can do.

40. A good marriage can look like a bad marriage for awhile.

41. The people who wound are wounded themselves.

42. The end of the chapter does not determine the end of the book.

43. There will be no homeowner’s association in heaven.

44. I cannot live my life for another’s agenda. My greatest test will be to discern God’s agenda from my own.

45. When I feel blue in my soul, it’s because I have not understood that prayer is the breath of the Christian.

46. If you live by fear, you will never rest. But if you live in freedom, you’ll have constant rest and your worries will pass.

47. You will never appreciate real peace until you’ve gone through a big storm.

48. Real men do dishes.

49. Ninety percent of getting anything worthwhile done is showing up.

50. It’s hard to hang onto a smooth rope. God puts knots in our cord so we can have a place to hold on.

The Divorce

2011-06-21T07:01:00.000-07:00

I did something yesterday, said goodbye to something that I hadn't planned. It's a divorce, in a lot of ways. I think it's a sign of health because I haven't been able to even consider doing this in the last two years. There were just too many things bigger than car insurance.

However, over the weekend things came to a head. Perhaps it was the cost of the new 6 month premium I finally got the nerve to open. Or it could have been the phone call I received from a young man at the insurance agency, the one with such boyish excitement in his voice.

"Mr. Fabry, I think I've found a way to save you a TON of money." He emphasized the TON part. Twice. Like it was GINORMOUS. I would be able to buy a boat, a new sleep number bed, or perhaps fill my gas tank.

"Really?" I said. "Tell me about it."

We went over my policies, my 5 cars, the cash cow that is my life. Insurance companies salivate when they see me driving down the street. I get mail from them every day. President Palmer from 24, the little Gecco, the lady in the nurse outfit, they all come to my door like Jehovah's Witnesses.

"Looks like we can save you $250 if you buy a new life insurance policy. It's a new program in the last year."

Really? I need to buy something else in order to save a TON? Something seemed GINORMOUSLY wrong with that picture. And why was I just getting the call now? I've been with this insurance company a long time. I started buying insurance from them in 1982, if I'm not mistaken. That's 28+ years. Does anybody stay with a company that long?

This company followed us from West Virginia to Illinois to Colorado to Arizona. But in actuality, I followed them. It was easier to stay with them because they had our records in their system. Call it lazy. I usually shop around, but I liked their commercials on TV, the color of the logo, the catchphrase, and the ease of writing their name on my check.

In the last 28+ years we've never had an accident. At least not one they covered. I backed into my daughter's car in our driveway and smashed the door. That was on me they said. My son dinged another man's car at Walmart. "You'd be a lot better off taking care of that yourself," my agent said. "Your premium would just go up."

I think we actually got a windshield or two in 28 years. And more than a couple of tows. But when we had our house problem in Colorado, the little one where we lost everything because of toxic mold, when we really needed answers, we found the insurance company didn't have any. Or money. Zero. It was a pat on the back, "Sorry that happened," and new premiums in the mail. My agent in Colorado, a man who attended a mega-church in town, said the equivalent of, "Be warmed and filled." He spoke with compassion but said mold was excluded on the policy. There was actually $5,000 worth of coverage but because it was a "slow leak," we were denied.

Sigh. I don't blame him. The industry got smart to mold about the same time we began having the problem. We had a contract and the contract excluded our problem. But I couldn't help feeling troubled by hearing platitudes. I wonder if I would have handled it any differently if I sold insurance? I wonder if I've said the same thing in other ways?

I don't for a second think this new company will be any better. It'll just be cheaper. And have a new logo. And for now, not ask me to buy a life insurance policy to reduce my auto insurance. And pay about 1/3 of what I was paying for 28+ years to my long-term friends.

I've tried hard to keep bitterness from this divorce. I've waited a long time to make a rational and not a hasty decision. A decision based on clear-headed thinking that protects the ones I love and helps me be a good steward of the funds entrusted to me. It's a healthy move. And I have a TON of hope about the future.

On this first day of summer, I'm not bitter. I'm just enthusiastic.

Dad Thoughts

2011-06-14T08:53:00.000-07:00

I'm going to be on Nancy Turner's program this Friday, if everything works out, and I had some thoughts about my own father. Nancy asked a few people to think of three things:

A memory of Dad
Advice to other Dads
Scripture about Dad

MEMORY
My father was a hard worker. He was employed at Union Carbide and worked full time there, plus he ran the farm. We had cattle and he cut hay and planted several gardens. I was SOOOO different than my dad. He was a hands in the earth kinda guy and I was writing songs and poems and stories and dressing up my dog and taking pictures.

My strongest memory of us together is what I wrote about in Dogwood. Throwing the ball back and forth at twilight, listening to the Cincinnati Reds games on the radio. Back and forth, from my hand to his glove to his hand to my glove…we didn’t say anything. We didn’t have to.

ADVICE
I heard some really good advice from John Fuller the other day—he has a new book called First Time Dad. John said that you don’t have to be the fun dad all the time. You don’t have to take your kids to a movie or the arcade or the amusement park every weekend. Take them to the hardware store to pick up light bulbs. Take them with you when you run errands. The quality time will come out in the quantity time. Driving to school can be a great time to connect or just be with each other. You don't have to be "fun" to give your kids something that lasts.

Another memory--when my dad would go to the feed store in town the guy behind the counter would always say, "Who you got with you today, Robert?"

"That's my helper," he would say.

It was such a good feeling to be a helper, even if I couldn't do anything to really help.

SCRIPTURE
Col 3:23-24 Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

My father lived that verse, whether it was fixing the tractor, mowing the yard, butchering cattle. There was just this free-wheeling joy of work that permeated his life, and to him, sweating was living. The hay dust…I would hate getting hay dust on my sweaty neck and down my back. He loved jumping into something and just doing it.

I am different. But I caught his passion in doing everything for God's glory and in a lot of ways it permeates what I do now.

Picture of the Week

2011-06-03T15:58:00.000-07:00

I described a picture of Charlie Brown and Snoopy on the radio this week. Both of them sitting by a lake and being pals. A listener sent me this photo of her and her dog. Peaceful and full of joy.

That's a good way to end this week. Hope you have someone you can share a good moment with today.
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Children's Reading List by Dr. Rosalie DeRosset

2011-06-03T11:05:00.000-07:00

Alcott, Louisa May. Little Women, Little Men, Jo’s Boys, etc.
Aldrich, Thomas Bailey. The Story of a Bad Boy.
Andersen, Hans Christian. Andersen’s Fairy Tales.
Avi. The True Confessions of Charlotte Coyle.
Babbit, Natalie. Tuck Everlasting.
Barrie, James. Peter Pan.
Burnett, Francis Hodgsen. The Secret Garden, A Little Princess.
Carroll, Lewis. Alice in Wonderland.
Cleary, Beverly. Dear Mr. Henshaw.
Cooper, Susan. The Grey King.
Cummings, J. Golden Legends.
Cummings, e.e.
Dahl, Roald. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, etc.
De Jong. Meindert. The Wheel on the Schoolhouse, The House of Sixty Fathers, etc.
De Saint Exupery, Antoine. The Little Prince.
Dickens, Charles. David Copperfield, etc.
Dickinson and Dickinson, eds. Children’s Second Book of Patriotic Stories.
Dodge, M. Hans Brinker and the Silver Skates
Doyle, Sir Arthur. Sherlock Holmes, etc.
Durrell, Gerald. My Family and Other Animals.
Enright, Elizabeth. Gone-Away Lake, Thinkable Summer, etc.
Estes, Eleanor. Ginger Pye, The Moffatts, etc.
Grahame, Kenneth. The Golden Age, The Wind in the Willows.
Grimm. Fairy Tales.
Haggard, Rider H. King Solomon’s Mines.
Hesse, Karen. Out of the Dust
Hinton, Susan. The Outsiders (teenagers)
Hunt, Irene. Across Five Aprils.
Johnston, Annie Fellows. The Little Colonel. (a series of books…may be out of print)
Juster, Norton. The Phantom Tollbooth.
Kingsley, Charles. Water Babies.
Kipling, Rudyard. Stories and Poems.
Konigsburg, E.L. From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler.
L’Engle, Madeline. A Wrinkle in Time, etc.
Lewis, C.S. The Chronicles of Narnia.
Lindren. Pippi Longstocking.
Lowery, Lois. The Giver, Number the Stars, etc.
MacDonald, George. Gifts of the Child Christ, The Princess and Curdie, The Golden Key, The Princess and the Goblin,. The Lost Princess (sometimes called The Wise Woman)—great fiction for parenting
Magorian, Michelle. Good Night, Mr. Tom
McCloskey, Robert. Make Way For Ducklings.
McKinky, Robin. Beauty, The Outlaws of Sherwood, The Blue Sword, The Hero and the Crown.
Merrill, Jean. The Pushcart War, The Toothpaste Millionaire.
Milne, A.A. Winnie the Pooh.
Montgomery, L.M. Anne of Green Gables.
Moody, Ralph. Little Britches.
Mowat, Farley. The Dog Who Wouldn’t Be.
Mulloch, Dinah Maria. The Adventures of a Brownie, The Little Lame Prince.
Neville, Emily. It’s Like This C
O’Brien, Robert C. Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of Nimh.
O’Neill, Mary. Hailstones and Halibut Bones.(teaches the poetry of color)
Orczy, Baroness. The Scarlet Pimpernel.
Patersen, Katherine. Bridge to Terabithia, Jacob Have I Loved, The Great Gilly Hopkins.
Paulsen, Gary. Hatchet. ( a boy learns to survive in the wilderness)
Polacco, Patricia. Thank you, Mr. Falker,Pink and Say,Chicken Sunday, The Butterfly
Potter, Beatrix. The Tale of Peter Rabbit, etc.
Raskin, Ellen. The Westing Game.
Ruskin, John. The King of the Golden River.
Sachar, Louis. Holes
Seredy, Kate. The Good Master, The Singing Tree, The White Stag, etc.
Sewell, Anna. Black Beauty.
Sidney, Margaret. The Five Little Peppers (series)
Silverstein, Shell. The Giving Tree
Smith, Dodie. I Capture the Castle
Spyri, Johanna. The Heidi Series
St. John, Patricia. Treasures of the Snow, etc. (wonderful Christian writer)
Steinbeck, John. The Acts of King Arthur and His Noble Knights
Stevenson, Robert Louis. Treasure Island, etc.
Tolkien, J.R.R. The Trilogy, The Hobbit
Twain, Mark. Tom Sawyer, Huckleberry Finn, etc.
Voigt, Cynthia. The Tillerman Cycle (7 books), Jackaroo, On Fortune’s Wheel, The Wings of a Falcon, Solitary Blue.
White, E.B. Charlotte’s Web, Stuart Little, The Trumpet of the Swan.
White, John. The Tower of Geburah.
White, T.H. The Once and Future King.
Wiggin, Kate Douglas. Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm.
Wilde, Oscar. Fairy Tales and Poems in Prose, etc.
Wilder, Laura Ingalls. Little House on the Prairie
Williams, Marguerite. The Velveteen Rabbit
Zindel, Paul. The Pigman (teenagers).

POETRY
De La Mare, Walter. Songs of Childhood.
Knapp, John. A Pillar of Pepper and Other Bible Nursery Rhymes.
Koch, Kenneth. Rose, Rose, Where Did You Get Your Red?
Silverstein, Shel. Where the Sidewalk Ends.
Stevenson, Robert Louis. A Child’s Garden of Verses
Utermeyer, Louis. Has many collections.

READING LIST: JR. HIGH AND HIGH SCHOOL ( some adult level)
(you’ll have to pace your child—some may do better than others with these)
Bronte, Charlotte. Jane Eyre (demanding reading)
Chesterton, G.K. Adventures of Father Brown (mystery), The Man Who Was Thursday.
Crane, Stephen. The Red Badge of Courage (history, adventure-- Civil War story)
Defoe, Daniel. Ronbinson Crusoe (adventure—wonderful study in the sovereignty of God) Somewhat demanding.
Doyle, Sir Arthur Conan. Adventures of Sherlock Holmes.
Dumas, Alexander. Count of Monte Cristo.
Flemming, Ian. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang (addventure)
Forbes, Esther. Johnny Tremain (adventure, history).
Gilbreth, Frank and Ernestine Carey. Cheaper by the Dozen (wonderful true story about a family with 12 children)
Hilton, James. Good-by Mr. Chips.
Hugo, Victor. Les Miserables (spine-tingling drama)
Lee, Harper. To Kill a Mockingbird (wonderful-teaches integrity and the evil of racism)
Lewis, C.S. Science Fiction trilogy,
Meader, Stephen. Shadow in the Pines (mystery).
Murphey, Robert. The Pond.
Potok, Chaim. The Chosen, The Promise (stories about friendship in the Hasidic Jewish community).
Rawlings, Marjorie. The Yearling (the movie is wonderful too).
Thurber, James. The Thirteen Clocks (humor).
Tolkiein, J.R.R. The Hobbit, The Fellowship of the Ring ( 4 volumes--fantasy)
Twain, Mark. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, Tom Sawyer (funny, adventure, sad).
Zindel, Paul. The Pigman

BIBLIOGRAPHIES AND BOOKS ABOUT THE IMPORTANCE OF READING
Guroian, Vigen. Tending the Heart of Virtue: How Classic Stories Awaken a Child’s Moral Imagination. (superlative look the the issues.)
Hunt, Gladys. Honey For a Child’s Heart.
Russell, William. Classics to Read Aloud to Your Children.
Tralease, Jim. The Read Aloud Handbook.
Wilson, Elizabeth. Books Children Love.
Wise, Jesse and Susan Wise Bauer. The Well-Trained Mind: A Guide to Classical Education at Home

YOUNGER CHILDREN’S LITERATURE BIBLIOGRAPHY
Ackerman, Karen. Song and Dance Man.
Blos, Joan W. Old Henry.
Blume, Judy. The Pain and the Great One.
Bourgeoois, Paullette. Franklin Fibs.
Douglass, Barabar. Good As New.
Dragonwagon, Crescent. Home Place.
Graham, Amanda. Who Wants Arthur?
Hall, Donald. Ox-Cart Man.
Hoban, Russell. Bedtime For Frances.
Hoffman, Mary. Amazing Grace.
Houston, Gloria. My Great-Aunt Arizona.
Howard, Jane R. When I’m Sleepy.
Jukes, Mavis. Like Jake and Me.
Keats, Ezra Jack. Goggles, Pet Show, Whistle for Willie.
MacLachlin, Patricia. Through Grandpa’s Eyes.
Martin, Rafe. The Rough-Face Girl.
McCloskey, Robert. Blueberrries for Sal.
McCully, Emily Arnold. Mirette on the High Wire.
McLerran, Alice. Roxaboxen.
Paterson, Katherine. The Tale of the Mandarin Ducks.
Rylant, Cynthia. The Relatives Came, When I Was Young in the Mountains.
Say, Allen. The Bicycle Man.
Sebestyen, Ouida. Words by Heart. (beautiful, painful story of a black family)
Waber, Bernard. Ira Sleeps Over.
Williams, Vera B. A Chair For My Mother.

GUIDE TO TEACHING CHILDREN IN THE CHURCH/TEACHING GUIDES
Dunlop, Cheryl. Follow Me As I Follow Christ.
Wise, Jesse and Susan Wise Bauer. The Well-Trained Mind: A Guide to Classical Education at Home

Ordinary Men Changed the World

2011-06-02T00:03:00.000-07:00

Andy and I went out to a local coffee shop tonight after our men's meeting. We've never done this without our wives before. (Actually, we've only gone out for cofee with them once.) We talked about...well, it doesn't matter what we talked about, really. His bathroom rehab. My family's health. Nothing about the NBA or baseball. Andy is a soccer fan--he would say the real kind of football.

There were others in the place. Single people with laptops. Married people with friends. Young people with hope. Everyone with some shade of caffeine in their hands.

And there was Andy in the corner speaking with an English accent, and me speaking without my southern twang. In big chairs that felt comfortable. Just ordinary guys.

It strikes me every time our group gets together how frighteningly ordinary we are. We all have problems. Hangups. Disappointments. Longings.

So did 12 men a couple thousand years ago. But Jesus chose them to follow him and through them he changed the world.

Think of it. 12 ordinary guys. This was the plan? No Facebook account? No Twitter? Good grief, at least get a blog, right? There was no marketing plan. No advertising budget. Just 12 ordinary men being changed by the power of God, the moving of the Spirit on them and through them.

If God can change the world through them, can't he do the same through you and me? And through Andy?

Yes, he can. But before they changed the world, those 12 ordinary men had to be changed. And Jesus was patient with them. And he spent time with them. And he poured himself out for them.

I want to change the world, too. But I suppose the best thing I can do to help in the process is allow myself to be changed one day, one attitude at a time. Small steps. Depth rather than width. Don't worry about the numbers, don't worry about the results. Just allow God to use what is weak to prove he is strong.

God loves ordinary men. And women. He loves to change them and the world.

Saying Goodbye

2011-05-23T15:43:00.001-07:00

This is exactly how I remember Jim Warren.

A phone to his ear, a newspaper in his hand, a big calendar behind him, and his Bible open. Jim knew that just covering news wasn't enough. Other outlets could do that well and had more staff. What they weren't airing was a Christian perspective of news events. So every day he took us to places and into people's lives who were on the front lines--and around the world.

Jim had a heart for people going through difficulty. He had a heart for people who were struggling. He loved music. He loved to laugh. In fact, he actually played ME singing a song I had written specifically for April 15th called, When My Taxes Are All Done. I sang as "Johnny OutaCash" and Jim howled.

Today Jim entered heaven. No more radio programs, no more pain. I'm sure he's already seen many friends he interviewed over the years. Francis Schaeffer. Jerry Falwell. He and Brandt Gustavson are probably telling some Moody stories. In fact, he's probably met D.L. already.

We mourn with Jean and the rest of the family. But we also rejoice in his homegoing. He's been promoted. While we still look through the glass darkly, Jim now sees his Savior face to face. That is our blessed hope.

Jim Warren

2011-05-19T07:11:00.001-07:00

A radio friend, Wayne Shepherd, called yesterday and mentioned a name you may remember. Jim Warren. Jim was the host of Prime Time America on Moody Radio for many years. Jim and I worked together—he on Prime Time, me on a program called Open Line. He was the most hard-working host I've ever encountered in my radio years. He loved doing what he did.

Jim's health has not been that great the past few years. He's been in the hospital for much of the past year. I won’t go into all of his problems, but Jim made a difficult decision in the past couple of days about his health, and with his family around him, it sounds like in a short while he will be free of the pain he's been through.

That’s up to God, of course. But I wanted you to know about Jim and I would like you to pray for him, for his wife Jean who has been by his side faithfully for so many years. Pray for their children who are also walking through this valley. This is not the easy part. This is the tough part. But if Jim could speak on my program, I think he would say that God’s grace has been evident even through these difficult days. And we can trust him. And lean on him. And cast every care upon him because he knows what we need.

So if you would pray for Jim and the family—I would appreciate it. And if you would like to send a card to him and his family, here's the address:

Jim and Jean Warren
4732 Doug Dr.
Whitehall, MI 49461

Also, we'll be conducting a tribute program for Jim on Friday, 5/20, Hour 2 of Chris Fabry Live! If you would like to say something to Jim, tell him what he has meant to you, call 1 866-953-2279 and leave a message. You can start the call with, "Hi Jim..."

Make A Difference 5/18

2011-05-18T15:00:00.000-07:00

We had a caller to today's Chris Fabry Live broadcast that didn't get on the air, but we told her we would ask listeners to pray. This is a heavy duty request, but God is in the business of heavy duty living.

Anonymous – I have been praying for my husband who is now living a gay lifestyle. Nothing is changing or getting through. Please join me in praying for my husband.

Father, you know the hurt of this relationship, and you know exactly what Anonymous is going through. Walk with her through this struggle. And call her husband. Show her each step to take to love him, but at the same time protect herself from harm. Cause him to turn his heart back toward his wife and get the help only you can provide.
Amen.

Two Things Jim Burns Said Today

2011-05-18T11:24:00.000-07:00

We were interviewing Jim, of HomeWord, for a future Building Relationships program. I wrote down these two things:

A four year old laughs 400 times a day.
The average adult laughs 14 times a day.

If the devil can't make you bad, he'll make you busy.

Vidalia Onions

2011-05-14T15:03:00.000-07:00

I went to the Farmer's Market this morning with Shannon because Andrea wasn't feeling well. Cabbage, carrots, onions, squash, broccoli, cauliflower, lettuce, and 10 dozen eggs.

$240. This is what we eat. This is our life.

Before heading home, I was intrigued by a new vendor. Actually an old vendor with a Shriner's hat and a wrinkled face. He was selling Vidalia onions. Straight from Georgia.

"They brought them by 18-wheeler," he said with a cute accent.

Pat Conroy has a great story about Vidalia onions, how they taste, how people fawn over the first crop each year. I have had Vidalia's before, but this seemed a purer crop to me, closer to the ground than the grocery. I forked over the $10 for 10 pounds and the man smiled.

Saturday is cleaning day at our house. Andrea and the girls/boys work hard to vacuum and launder the whole house. I help out, but my major task today was my office.

At 2 PM I started getting hungry for lunch. What do have?

I found the biggest Vidalia onion and cut it up. I threw it in a skillet with some oil, then cut up some cabbage. What should I put in there to help it out?

Pondering that question, I picked a sliver of onion from the spatula as I turned the concoction. Someone had put sugar in the pan. I was sure of it. I tried another sliver. Sweet. Like honey.

Wait. There was no sugar in the pan, that was the onion.

I cracked two eggs and spread them over the skillet, simmered and turned it, then mixed in a little butter/salt/pepper.

Even though they were carried on the back of a truck all the way to Arizona, I feel like I'm in a field in Georgia, among the first at the harvest.

I've always thought of the forbidden fruit as an apple. Perhaps the Garden of Eden was somewhere in Toombs County.

Mark Mittelberg Prayer

2011-05-04T12:55:00.001-07:00

God, I don’t understand the mystery of it all. I can’t comprehend why you would care enough for me to send Jesus Christ to pay the penalty of my sins. But with all my lack of understanding, I am willing to yield to you completely. I trust in Jesus’ death for me, and I believe he rose to give us new life. I accept the promise you made in John 3:16, which tells us, “Everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.”

I do believe, Lord, and I accept all that you have for me: your forgiveness, your leadership, and your help through life’s ups and downs. I want to become your child. I am yours—body, mind, and soul—and I know that you are mine. Thank you for forgiving my sins and, even now, starting to guide me into this new life. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Yay for Billy

2011-05-03T09:54:00.000-07:00

So much of writing a story is having the confidence to keep going even though voices in your head tell you to stop. No one will read this. No one will care. Who are you to write anything? Move on to something else.

Those voices were strong when I began writing Almost Heaven. After all, the main character is not a celebrity. He’s a loner. An almost invisible guy you wouldn’t be able to pick out of his high school reunion picture. He lived his whole life in West Virginia. In a holler. Unknown by most of the world.

Except there was something compelling about Billy Allman. From the moment I heard his story and began to piece together the plot of his life, I was captivated. Every day I went to my closet (literally) to find out what was going on in his life. Billy was a real man who died two years ago. His story forms the backbone of the book.

The other compelling angle the story took was the perspective of the angel sent to aid Billy and watch his every move. I don’t believe everyone has a guardian angel. At least, I’m not sure everyone has one. But I do know that God uses the angelic realm in our realm, and to be able to pull back the curtain a bit also brought me to the computer and encouraged me about my own life.

Yesterday I heard that the book won an award from the Evangelical Christian Publishers Association. The other novels nominated were fantastic. There are no “losers” on that list. But when I heard Almost Heaven was chosen, my first thought was, “Yay Billy.” And my second thought was, “Thank you, God.” He delights in choosing simple, humble things. He has a plan and purpose for every story, yours and mine included.

Maybe you feel like Billy today. I’m not sure if he ever won any award in school or in life. Was he patrol of the year? Did he win at the spelling bee? I don’t know. But I do know that because of his relationship to God through Jesus, he was guided and sometimes dragged for God’s glory. And that makes a compelling story for any life.

Yay for Billy. Thanks to God.

To view the complete list of 2011 Christian Book Award winners and finalists, click here.

Mister Kitty

2011-04-13T13:28:00.000-07:00

A listener emailed to tell me about the loss of her beloved pet after 16 1/2 years of companionship. Here's her tribute to Mister Kitty.

Basketballs on the Wall

2011-04-04T12:47:00.000-07:00

Even after we left the home, they wouldn’t dare paint over our basketball wall.

Illusions

2011-04-01T07:11:00.000-07:00

My wife, Andrea, was asked last year to be part of a devotional project and I’m excited that the book is available now. There are many great authors/writers/thinkers included, but I am partial to her one-page devotional on “Illusions.”

Andrea and I talked about this topic on the 3/29 Chris Fabry Live! program. If you missed it, click here to listen to the podcast or stream.

Check out the resource and begin your own 90-day Tending of the Soul!

Telling Secrets Email

2011-03-30T11:57:00.001-07:00

Here are a few responses we received to yesterday's Chris Fabry Live! conversation about admitting infidelity.

I am still dumbfounded about your program today... nothing there convinces me one should “confess” their infidelity after 10 years... It is cruel!!!

That last caller made me upset to say that it's terrible to let your wife know about the adultery. It’s a selfish act in and of itself and then on top of that to not confess your sin is horrendous. You cannot have a relationship built on lies and deceit.

I was there 35 years ago. Some overzealous Christian told my husband to tell me. Thanks a lot!! Now it became also my problem?! We had come through a hard time and had solved all that and were doing well. I forgave him and we continued but even now 35 years later when the question comes up it hurts my soul. LET IT BE!!

Things that are done in the dark will come out in the light. God has given John a chance to come clean on his own, if he believes the whispers of the enemy to stay quiet, and that in doing so he is protecting the so-called nice relationship he and his wife have, he is basing his reality on a lie.

I would have to say that if the person has confessed the affair to the Lord, and repented, then they should trust in God's forgiveness and not let Satan use this mistake in their life to destroy their marriage and their family. Satan is the destroyer and he will destroy as much as he can using guilt to do so. Every situation is different, but if at all possible confess to a trusted, faithful friend who can keep it confidential. We are all responsible for our own mistakes, but don't let Satan take advantage of them by doing horrible damage to your loved ones.

Didn't our Savior Himself say, "You shall know the truth and the truth will set you free?" I've been on both sides of the issue of unfaithfulness, and I believe the truth should be made known! An unfaithful mate is living a lie, and has broken vows made before God and witnesses. The best way to kill a lie is to blast its soil of secrecy away with the Light of Truth! Truth frees! Truth heals!

I enjoy your show, but sometimes wish you wouldn't tease us along with "I have a 5 word question to pose, but I'm not going to ask it yet"... After yesterday's question about the infidelity, I was determined to start listening to past programs on the internet, because I desperately want to hear how this discussion plays out.
(I apologize—the 5 word question that I never gave you is, “What does love look like?”)

As the wife of an unfaithful husband I wanted to comment on John's email. I believe his unease with keeping his affair a secret is the work of the Holy Spirit. While it would be easier on him to not confess and just move on, I don't believe the marriage can be truly healed without confession. Trying to just move on is like putting a bandaid over a dirty wound. The only way to heal a festering wound is to go thru the painful process of opening it up and cleaning it all out. It is an ugly, painful thing to go thru but it is the only path to healing.

I have been through the situation put forth in your discussion today. My opinion is that, unless the guilty person is asked or it is very likely that the incident will come out, the information should not be shared with the "innocent" spouse. I am not a weak or emotional person, nor is my walk with Christ weak. I can forgive and did that with all my heart but forgetting is another thing. I remember thinking many times, his burden and guilty feelings seem gone - they've been passed to me. I believe that telling a spouse simply passes a burden from one to the other.

I've been told that most men have thoughts of sex on a regular basis. In the New Testament, Jesus addresses that sin ("in the heart," which may be somewhat different) as unfaithfulness. Would you tell your wife every wayward thought you have? Or, would your wife tell you of hers?

I speak from personal experience. As a woman whose spouse was unfaithful years ago, I find this to be a very traumatic experience. I believe he should confess to his pastor or a spiritual friend in order to heal personally. There are days that I pray and tell God I wish I never found out about this.

Please, never discourage confession of a sin to the one who has been offended. God cannot bless a marriage where sin is kept in the dark and Satan has the authority to use it to steal, kill and destroy!

Have been listening today and I don't think you need to "hang out your dirty laundry" after so many years. What good is it going to do? Except make you feel better. What bothers me -- is if this man confessed this to our Lord--then why hasn't it been pointed out to him that Satan is the accuser. God has forgiven and "cast it into the deepest ocean and hung up a No Fishing sign."

I was appalled at the various callers who "justified" the lies in their marriages regarding their infidelity by "protecting" their poor fragile spouse, or for the betterment of the marriage. There is NO scriptural basis for lies in a marriage. On the other hand there is an abundance of scripture supporting confessing sin. The notion one is protecting the spouse is nauseatingly self-serving.

It all boils down to this... you have to want to be right with God even more than you want to be right with your wife. God is able to sustain your marriage and make it even stronger after you both work through this together.

I am a Christian Marriage and Family counselor. One of my areas of focus is working with couples where there has been one or more affairs. What I heard you say was something like- if a person is only telling their spouse the truth about a past affair to ease their guilt and put it on their spouse, that this is a selfish reason and they should not do it. What I would say is that all of us develop complicated systems of rationalization around the thoughts and behaviors we have that we don't want to bring out into the light. God tells us to confess. He does not tell us to wait until our motivations are pure. The truth has a way of opening us up to the realities of what is going on inside of us. Without confession our relationships have barriers to healing and we are at risk of repeating these behaviors because we don't experience the pain of consequences nor do we shift our personal boundaries that might strengthen our marriages and our relationship with God. Pain is the greatest motivator for change. Spouses do fall apart, there is anger, and sadness, and distrust, and grief, and shame, and finally hope. It starts with the truth. I feel strongly about this because I have seen God do mighty work in relationships that have been so completely devastated by affairs.

In the Market

2011-03-15T10:14:00.002-07:00

I'm going to be appearing on Janet Parshall's program this afternoon at 4:00 Central Time. We'll talk about the radio program, my book Almost Heaven, and whatever else Janet brings up. If you've listened to Janet, you know what a grasp she has on issues and her heart for communicating truth in the marketplace of ideas. Which raises the question, "Why is she having me on?"

I guess we'll both find out, and if you don't hear it live, you can listen to the podcast or stream. We'll probably talk about Christian radio, connecting with people, writing, stories, and Almost Heaven. I believe in the power of stories. I think they can change lives. This one seems to have captured the imagination of some people who need some encouragement.

Fiction is hard to do on a talk program. There are only so many ways you can ask, "How do you come up with your stories?" But Janet is a pro. She can make reading the phone directory interesting, so I'm hoping it will encourage some listeners.

Many hearts are heavy for the people of Japan. In a strange way, Almost Heaven begins with a cataclysmic event that reminded me of their pain. The Buffalo Creek flood happened in 1972. There was no radiation leak, but many houses, cars, homes, and lives were washed away because of a breached coal slurry dam at the mouth of the hollow. It's as close to a tsunami as you get in West Virginia. The thirty-foot wall of water ran down the hollow for 17 miles leaving death and destruction. This is how Billy Allman's story began. Through it all, God was walking with him.

I wonder if there are Billy Allmans in Japan right now who feel like life is stacked against them? I wonder if there are people there who feel like giving up? My prayer for the Japanese people is that they will rise above all of the mountains that stand before them. May this tragedy lead them to an eternal relationship that can't be taken away.

Pippen and Socks

2011-03-11T05:19:00.002-07:00

I’m speaking at a men’s conference/retreat in a month. I know the message but the illustrations are hard to choose. Today some things came together and one strong memory returned.

The message is about dropping our nets and following God. The example is of our dog, Pippen. I hadn’t remembered this until the other day when we were talking about socks. Pippen, when he could still see, would go through the house and pick up our socks from the floor. I have no idea why. He just loved to pick them up and carry them in his mouth. Maybe it’s a dog thing.

I used to find socks outside where he would carry them and drop them in the yard. At first I couldn’t understand why the kids were so irresponsible. Then I watched Pippen closely and discovered his secret sock stealing. When I found him with a sock in his mouth, I would say, “Pippen, drop it.” Sheepishly, he would put his mouth to the carpet and let the sock go. Just as quickly he’d pick it up again.

When he tried to run with my socks in his mouth, dangling, he’d get tripped up. When he needed to drink or to eat, he had a hard time deciding whether to get nourishment or keep the sock. Even when Pippen went blind, he managed to find socks and carry them around. It affected his ability to follow us or come when he was called.

I’m so much like him. There are things I hold onto tightly that aren’t good for me. There are good things I hang onto that I shouldn’t. They slow me down and keep me from running, keep me from being free, keep me from following more closely to my master.

It’s not just a dog thing, I guess. It’s a people thing, too.

The Scent of Insulin

2011-03-08T03:44:00.003-07:00

I hate the smell of insulin at 1:30 a.m. I hate the smell of just about anything that early, but especially insulin. It smells like something stored in an army footlocker. Maybe old combat boots. Perhaps a textbook on WWII tactical weaponry.

At 1:14 this morning Colin awakened me, his face close to mine. “I feel low.”

I hate those three words, too. Not because I have to get out of bed but because I know what it’s doing to his body. How ravenous he will be. I’ll need to act counterintuitive to that.

Okay, I won’t lie, I hate getting out of bed. It’s a long way up from the air mattress and my bones want to stay close to the ground.

So we do the pancreas dance. He trudges from the room and slumps in a chair, his jaw slack, panting. He gets out his insulin case, opens it, retrieves the poker, gets up, washes his hands, goes back, pokes, gets blood, inserts the strip into the meter, waits for it…waits for it...

I stumble into the kitchen without glasses and stare at the green numbers on the microwave.

1:14.

I hate diabetes.

“Beep.”

“58,” he says.

Normal people have a pancreas that works. Normal people take their pancreas for granted. You eat a bag of Doritos or a Snickers bar and never pray your pancreas will produce insulin. Your pancreas regulates your body’s blood glucose levels to remain steady somewhere between 80 and 120. Don’t hold me to that, it’s early. But that’s basically where you stay. Fall below 70 and you feel it. Fall below 60 and you shake. Keep going down and you’ll eventually pass out. Some people don’t feel it anymore, they can’t tell they’re getting low, but Colin can. Sometimes I think that’s God’s gift to us.

He has a spoonful of organic honey that organic bees have been spitting into organic buckets on organic bee farms somewhere in Organicville. That will bring him up a notch and take the edge off. But we’ve only begun. He has 3 little mini-peeled carrots which aren’t approved by the organic bee society, but I don’t see anybody from that organization in the kitchen at 1:40 and their 800 number isn't staffed at this hour. So he eats the three mini-peeled carrots.

I’ve been known to make a stir fry at this point, chopping onions and cabbage and mixing with an egg or two. It’s protein and will help him hang on until morning. I grab two eggs from the refrigerator in the garage and Colin meets me there, pulling out a special drawer.

“I was thinking this,” he says, holding out a Granny Smith apple. The organic kind with the orange ring around it.

I roll my eyes like it’s fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. We haven’t had fruit for a long time but apples are slowly being reintroduced to the diet. I have no idea what this is going to do to his levels. His body will react wildly to the fructose. You will say, “But it’s an apple, leave the kid alone.”

Exactly. It’s just an apple. That’s why I hate diabetes. I have to dose him for a stupid apple.

I hate dosing a shaking kid who gets up in the middle of the night. I hate drawing up the insulin and handing him a needle he shoves into his skin. But if I don’t, his number will rise above 120, above 200, above 300.

So I write all this down in his book I also hate that says when he went to bed he was 111. And I see how much insulin I gave him to keep him in range overnight. We obviously overdid it, but when I compare the number from the previous night that was exactly the same, I wonder. Did he have more exercise? Did he not have something right before bed to hold his levels steady? Am I supposed to click my heels three times and say some magic incantation to keep him above 80? How does a pancreas do it?

I make the eggs, but get shell in the pan, so I have to get a spoon to scoop out the shell, but since I don’t have my glasses on I bend low to see it and I bang my head on the hood above the stove. He eats the apple and watches all this, as if it’s a Disney sitcom. I’m not thinking words they say on Disney.

I hand him the eggs and get out the insulin bottle. We have determined that there were 24 carbs in the apple. There were also a few in the honey and the mini-peeled carrots.

“How much would you have for just the apple?”

“Mom would give me 2 units.”

My wife would give this dose without thinking. She rattles carbs in her brain like a supercomputer. I am right-brained, more creative, which is wonderful if you’re writing a song or a book or an essay on civility, but if you want to keep a kid’s glucose meter from saying “HIGH” and playing Mozart’s Requiem at 1:55, you need the left hemisphere of your brain and I do not have as much as my wife does.

I can’t give him 2 units. I do not want him shaking in an hour or two. But I don’t want him to go high either. That is my conundrum at 2 a.m. Forty-five minutes ago I was under the covers. I'm beginning to think I won't be going back to bed.

I decide on 1.25 units. I feel good about that. It’s a safe dose. I hand him the needle and he puts it in his thigh. Was it enough? Probably not.

He looks in the refrigerator again, the light reflecting off his face and the robe that makes him look like Hugh Hefner’s son. He sighs, closes the door, and rubs his eyes on his way back to bed.

“Goodnight,” he says.

“Goodnight.”

“I love you,” he says.

It won’t be long before he’s doing all of this by himself. It won’t be long before he’s staring into his own refrigerator in his own house or apartment. I’ll be asleep somewhere, oblivious to all of this.

“Love you, too,” I say.

And I do.

No matter how much I hate diabetes and organic bees and sharp needles and writing down statistics of a little boy who didn't do anything to deserve this, I love him. And that’s what will keep me up until 4 when I’ll check him again.

*Addendum*
4:20 a.m. It took me five minutes to wake him, but we tested. His level is 148. Within the acceptable range. Sigh.

The Moment

2011-03-01T12:51:00.000-07:00

This is my friend, Phil, or as we knew him, Phillip. Our friend from Shoney's knew how to operate his camera phone better than he did.

Early Retirement

2011-02-16T09:07:00.000-07:00

I did something yesterday I never thought I'd do. I took a set of 5 contracts to the bank to have notarized. A young man, probably in his mid-20s, invited me to sit down and sign where all the sticky labels said, "Sign here."

"Is this a real estate deal?" the young man asked.

"No, it's an option contract for a book I wrote." Whatever that means. I have no idea. They tell me it means some day in the future a movie might be made of my book, June Bug. It's taken more than a year just to get the contract signed. I can't imagine how long it would take to write the script and hire actors. And then you have to order coffee and cater the movie set. I could be old and washed up by then. But signing the contract was exciting. I never dreamed anyone would be interested in making a movie out of something I wrote.

Wait. That's not true. I've dreamed it about everything I've ever written. I dream they'll make a movie out of my grocery lists. I just never thought the opportunity would come. And here I was, in my shorts and Ohio State hat, in my hour of triumph.

"Cool," the teenager with the notary stamp said. "Are you retired?"

I stared at him, too dumbfounded to answer. When I gathered my wits I said, "No, I work every day. I write every day." Retired? I had my two youngest with me. Did he think they were my grandkids? Retired? I should have whacked him with my cane. Whippersnapper.

My father's birthday is today. He's 91. He's retired. He uses a walker now. He was 41 when I was born. You can do the math.

I signed the pages and explained the book's plot. He was so interested he forgot to stamp one of the contracts. So I handed it back to him and then put a gold star on it when he finished. And gave him a red sucker from the counter. He was excited.

Retired? I'm not even 50. (For those who can't do the math.)

My wife, later, suggested that because we live near a military installation there are people who are retired at younger ages, which makes sense, but I didn't have the heart to ask her if she thought I looked like a retired military man. General Patton didn't have all this sagging skin and underdeveloped muscles.

Maybe I need a haircut. That's what it is. When it gets longer, it looks more gray. It ages me. If I could only find my bifocals to read the phone number of the local Supercuts.

Retired?

Maybe the next time I get my dentures resized or have that prostate exam I can ask them to give me a trim.

Retired?

You've heard of laughing all the way to the bank. This was the opposite. I was limping away, weeping. Gnashing the teeth I have left. Just to show him I drove straight to FedEx but couldn't remember why I was there. Lucky I had my grandsons with me.

Dixie

2011-01-10T12:53:00.001-07:00

This is Dixie, the Australian Shepherd we heard on Chris Fabry Live! last Friday, barking at all the cows along the Florida roadside. Thanks to her owner, Lindsey, for sending us this shot!

A Cry at Christmas

2010-12-24T10:36:00.000-07:00

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about being grateful for where I am rather than where I’m not. And I’ve realized that leaving things behind means freedom. Facing the truth about yourself and whatever situation you’re in can be difficult, but it doesn’t mean you have to obscure the truth. Being real is not hiding or forgetting. Wholeness means you can equally embrace the past, present, and the future and the truth about all of them.

For example, I was writing a scene today where a man goes into a Subway restaurant for a drink of soda. The face of my son, Colin, flashed in my mind and I had a pang of regret and nostalgia. He used to love getting a little cup of Sprite with a sandwich. Now that he has Type 1 Diabetes, those days are over. Yes, he could have diet sodas, but the health risks outweigh the upside, we think.

What he eats or drinks isn’t the point. The point is his life has been forever altered. He’ll never go a day the rest of his life without thinking about the fact that his pancreas doesn’t work. That’s sad. That’s a loss.

However, thinking about his life now and the way his health has turned around makes me grateful. He gets lots of exercise and enjoys really good food now, not the junk you get in a fast food restaurant. Today we’ll play some basketball and get our heart rates going. Somehow, to say that I’m grateful for this, feels like I’m snatching something from the loss. I’m not giving pain its full due if I see the bright side. But both are true. Colin’s life is altered and he has experienced a great loss. But it’s also true that he’s on a good path.

Perhaps the reason I’m thinking about this is that plaintive baby’s cry in the manger. The cry of a newborn from the pain of birth. Hunger. Was there something more to the cry? They say a mother knows her baby’s cry. Andrea has always known if our kids are hungry or angry by their cries. Did Mary sense something different about the wails of her firstborn son? Perhaps this was part of what she pondered in her heart.

This little baby had stepped from heaven’s shores and the glory of that peace-filled land. In fact, the creator of everything had flown from a land that knew no sin to a landscape where sin had touched everything. The one who had fashioned the stars now lay helpless under starlight. The one who had spoken a word and scattered the angelic host, was now proclaimed as the Savior by those he had created. The earth he had formed held him in that dusty, Middle Eastern village.

Jesus had given up much in order to become man. There was more than divine desire that compelled him on the road he was to travel. It was deep desire from the heart of God to love, to give, for it was in the suffering, the struggle, the laughter and tears and nails and wood and blood that he would do his greatest work. Spit and dirt opened eyes. A touch of his garment led to healing. If he had never made the trip, there would not be redemption or salvation or as much glory due to his name. His mission was rescue. His life was ransom, fully paid.

That story spills over us. Dust and sand and dirt and rocks and trouble everywhere. The past and all the idyllic visions we had about what will be, might be, could be. Today I am listening to my own heart cry for something more. Something that says the past is real and full of loss, and that the future is filled with questions and hardship, but also something good. Indescribable. Whole.

In the suckling child of Bethlehem, in the stillness of that starry night, you and I sit in wonder at the mercy and grace of a God who did not grasp, but who let go of his Father’s hand and grasped the finger of a young mother. He knew there would be such agony and pain. And he did it anyway. He came to us not in spite of our sin and “lostness,” but because of it.

That’s what makes me cry this Christmas. They are tears we share with that baby. That man. With God himself—God with us.

Anniversary

2010-12-18T07:46:00.001-07:00

I ran an errand yesterday with my daughter, Shannon. She knew it was our anniversary today. “So, when did you know you were in love with Mom? What was the progression?”

Good question. I hadn’t thought about it for a long time. I explained how we met—I was an animal trainer with the circus—no, wait, I was in Special Ops with a clandestine military group… I used to do that, make up stories of how we met, telling the kids I was everything from a coal miner to a professional cheerleader.

I was a leader for our InterVarsity Christian Fellowship group at Marshall University. In the fall of 1981, Andrea Kessel came to West Virginia to take a job in radio and volunteered to help out at the local university. I still remember what she wore to that first meeting, the blue bell bottoms, the razor thin sandals, the striped shirt with the little tie thing at the top.

I remember that she laughed at my jokes and came up to me afterward and talked about radio and tennis and life. We had a lot in common. By December of 1981, I had asked her to my radio station’s Christmas party. That was our first date. One year later, to the day, we were married. In a private ceremony at the White House.

Things progressed pretty quickly. Back when I was a professional fisherman, I learned when I had a catch and when I should throw the fish back. Andrea was a keeper. We were drawn together like the ocean tide is drawn to the shore, like refrigerator magnets are drawn to…refrigerators, like flies to warm potato salad.

“But when did you know you were in love?” Shannon said.

“My concept of love is different than you see in Hollywood movies or in most of the culture. Love is a feeling that comes and goes. It’s warm and fuzzy and makes you feel tingly inside. It’s like champagne—as long as you feel the fizz, you’re in love. But when the feeling goes away, you’re out of love and you leave because what you’re in the relationship for is the feeling. To many, love is like a bank account. When you withdraw all the money, the account is empty and you move on to another relationship in order to get the same feeling.”

Shannon has heard this before, in various ways. She’s a veteran of the “commitment” speech. But I kept going. And I will hereby keep going and flesh out this postulate.

To me, love is not wrapped in a feeling I get, but is an action on my part. It’s a commitment made based on a desire I have for good to the other person. I love her, not because she makes me feel befuddled on the inside. I love her because I’ve chosen to love her, in spite of all of her foibles, problems, and negatives. And not respecting her beauty, desirability, sex appeal, and winsome personality. My love is not an exhaustible bank account that runs out when she makes me unhappy. My love is an action based on my commitment for her good.

And here’s the really great part of this type of love. I am still befuddled by her. I am still tingling. It was 28 years ago today that she walked down the aisle in a beautiful, white dress, and said, “I do” to me. Best day of my life. Scary day. We began a journey neither of us understood. We couldn’t imagine what was ahead. But we’re going through it together. Committed to each other through the good, the bad, and the moldy.

“Did that answer your question?” I said to Shannon.

“Not really,” she said, smiling, as if she had heard all of that before. As if she were proud in some way to have parents who are still together. As if she already knew the answer to the question.

She knows that love is not a tingle. She has seen us fight like cats and dogs and pout and cry and say mean things to each other. She knows we’re not together simply because of our fortitude. Yes, we are committed to each other. Marriage is work and we’ve done some heavy lifting over the years. Of course, my stint as a professional body builder helped. But the dirty little secret of love is that even if you’re committed, even if you try your hardest to stay “in” it, you’re going to fall out of it at some point and wind up in the same place the people who are in it for the tingles wind up. Even the most committed marriage in the world will fall apart.

The real reason we’ve stuck together for 28 years is because of something unseen, something other-worldly, and something that doesn’t have anything to do with us. What drew us to each other was not ourselves, our interests, or our backgrounds. What keeps us together is not ourselves. God is the third cord. He gets the credit for anything good that comes out of our marriage. A marriage that lasts is a gift. It’s up to us to treasure it and open it every day.

So I’m grateful today, 28 years later, to the one who said “I do.” And I’m grateful, eternally, for the One who brought us together in his timing, for his purposes.

That kind of gives me a tingle.

Aliza Mattea Castaldo

2010-12-07T21:48:00.000-07:00

If you heard Chris Fabry Live today, you know about Chris Castaldo and the hospital. Good news! Fabriana was born shortly after we hung up the phone! Here's the news from Chris’ blog:

Our dear little girl, Aliza Mattea, was born today. Aliza means “joyful” in Hebrew and Mattea is Italian for “gift of God.” After nearly twenty-four hours in the delivery room, it was joyful indeed when she finally arrived.

The hour preceding Aliza’s birth was memorable. It started last week when Tricia McMillan, producer of the Chris Fabry Live program, asked me to join Chris on his radio program. Tricia gave me several dates to choose from. After selecting one, I told Angela, “This is when you’re going to give birth.” Sure enough!

As Angela neared the end of her labor, I stood in the room across the hall on the telephone. Every few minutes I received a text message from friends who were listening to the radio interview. What a privilege and delight. Chris Fabry led listeners from all over the country to pray for Angela and the baby, and just 14 minutes after completing the interview, as I stood beside Angela’s bed, a newborn baby’s cry was heard.

Congratulations, Castaldo family!

The Gift of a Story

2010-11-27T11:50:00.001-07:00

I listened to a section of last year's Christmas program on Chris Fabry Live! the other day. It's not because I'm narcissistic. Well, I am, but the reason I listened again was due to a listener who lives in the mountains of California who called and said that program meant a lot to her. Her son had committed suicide in the past year and she said that program meant so much. I wondered what we had said. (Andrea, my wife, was our featured guest.)

Toward the end of the program I read a few paragraphs from the story I was working on. I had written that section earlier that morning. As I read, I made the mistake of looking at Andrea, who was in a little puddle. The section was from Almost Heaven, Billy's message to his listeners who were struggling. They were words that helped a struggling mom in California nearly a year later. They were words that challenged me again as I listened.

My goal in writing is to move readers as much as I've been moved by other writers. Sentences that ring true to the heart and don't gloss over life's hurts. I long to hear readers say they underlined sections of the book and want to read it again more slowly.

Over the past few months I've sensed that I need to let go of the controls on the "writing thing" and let the books get into the hands of as many people as possible. If you'd like to help with that, we're instituting a Christmas special for Almost Heaven, Dogwood, and June Bug, my trilogy of West Virginia fiction. If you purchase two books, you'll receive one free—any combination of these titles. And I'll personalize them for you for Christmas and throw in free shipping. Just click on the What's New tab above or follow the link in the sidebar to find this offer on my website.

The gift of a story is a wonderful thing. I'd love to see something from Dogwood under your tree this season.

The Elusive Pat Conroy and the Kindness of a Stranger

2010-11-11T12:47:00.000-07:00

We are not defined by our losses, but they do mark us. Hence, I don’t spend a lot of time looking back, grieving. But every now and then I think of my office in Colorado, the friends I left behind there in the form of books. No, not books, treasures.

Part of that treasure includes the loss of Pat Conroy. He is one of my favorite writers because his novels (one in particular) struck a deep, deep chord within. It still does. I had several copies of The Prince of Tides, including the audio version recorded by Frank Muller. I also had a framed picture of Beaufort, S.C. that my wife gave me that reminds me of our trip to Fripp Island in 1998.

On that trip, I discovered that Pat frequented a grocery store named T.T. Bones. The proprietor said if I left the books with her and paid for the postage, she would have him sign the books and send them to me. I bought hard cover copies of The Prince of Tides and The Water is Wide, two of my favorites. A couple of weeks later I found them in the mailbox, signed in the Conroy way, “For the love of Fripp!”

Then, when Pat’s nonfiction book about his days of playing basketball for The Citadel came out, I had a fleeting moment of meeting him in a long line at the Tattered Cover in Denver. I even took a picture of him and hung it on my wall.

In October of 2008, we abandoned our home and all our belongings because of a toxic mold exposure. Our children were sick, my wife and I were sick, and the toxicologist told us not to chance taking anything with us. No pictures, no furniture, no books. I had an extensive collection of writing books that I miss every day I sit in my little office and try to create, but I miss nothing more than the sight of those signed books by Conroy.

Over the years I’ve tried to come up with a creative way to have Pat on my radio show. However, the type of fiction he writes is not conducive to a “Christian” talk show. He tells great stories, and there are deep aspects of faith in them, but I haven’t been able to figure out the right subject matter.

Then I heard about a new nonfiction book that released November 2. My Reading Life is a literary travelogue of sorts, reflections about the books Pat has read and how they’ve affected him. This was my chance. The 200 or so outlets that take our program would finally hear Pat Conroy, and more importantly, I would get the chance to speak with a literary legend.

I contacted the publicist for his book and told him what a fan I am and how I would welcome any amount of time with Mr. Conroy. I received a message that his schedule was closed. He only did a limited amount of media for the book. However, the publicist said he would send me something. He had no idea of the story I just told you.

Today a FedEx package arrived. Small. Thin. I thought it might be a copy of the book. I opened it gingerly and found a page from the book printed on card stock. It was numbered 11/500. “Why I Write” was at the top. At the bottom was Pat’s signature.

I couldn’t believe the kindness of this stranger who sent me such a gift. It felt like a nudge from above saying, “Keep going. Keep telling stories. Tell them well.” I would trade it for a conversation, of course. But I wouldn’t trade the grateful feelings of nostalgia and inspiration.

Midday Connection

2010-11-11T08:48:00.000-07:00

Good news—I will be one of the guests on Midday Connection tomorrow (Friday 11/12), talking about life, love, and Almost Heaven.

Anita Lustrea was kind enough to ask me to join her for a few minutes and I’m excited about the interview. You can hear it at noon Central Time or listen via the podcast or stream at MiddayConnection.org.

Special Offer

2010-11-09T11:42:00.001-07:00

I just downloaded my latest book from Amazon. Free. And you can, too.

Through a promotion with Tyndale House Publishers, Amazon.com is offering Almost Heaven free for the Kindle for a limited time. Just click here and it's yours for the checking out.

I don’t own a Kindle, but I downloaded the Kindle software free from Amazon which means I can read my own book for nothing! If you have a computer and can get to the Internet and if you like free things, this is a no-brainer. Just go to Amazon.com, click on Kindle on the left side, then “Download free reading apps.” It’s a great way to get Almost Heaven. And did I mention it’s free?

Maybe I can get them to write my next book so I don’t have to do anything.

The Trip Home

2010-11-08T09:11:00.003-07:00

I had a one-day meeting in Nashville and decided to combine that with a trip to see my parents in West Virginia. My father is 90, my mother 83, and they live alone at the top of a knoll surrounded by trees, turkey, deer, and occasional hunters.

I rented a car and drove the 6 hours from TN. I pulled into their driveway early on Friday morning while it was still dark and stretched out with a jacket as a cover. A knock on the window awakened me. It was their neighbor, Fred, who mows their hay and runs off the occasional hunters.

“You’re the youngest one!” he said.

He apologized for waking me, but it actually gave me a good feeling to have someone watching out for them.

My mother and father pray before each meal. They’ve been married almost 61 years. They kiss each other just before going to take a nap. One will bring a cover for the other or a warm cup of soup or decaf. Their silent ways of saying “I love you” are perhaps the most enlightening. The blood pressure kit that is dutifully produced for another check of heart rate. The simple act of cleaning one another’s glasses. Picking lint from a shirt or flicking off an errant spider.

My father’s memory is fading. People and faces come and go. The score from the game we watched the night before. My mother speaks in hushed tones about the depth of his failure to recall. She is his memory. She hears for him. Though at times he seems to hear and remember perfectly well, so it all could be an act.

It concerned me when I saw my mother frantically going through the backseat of their Chevy Impala. My father has always been a Chevy man, though there were the Mazda years in the 1970s and 80s. She was looking for her extra set of car keys—the ones with the grocery store discount tags attached. She guessed she lost them at some store. Or, perhaps my older brother had misplaced them after his trip home. We went through all the possibilities.

This did not sound plausible to me. How would she have driven home if she lost the keys at a store? My brother is detail oriented. I asked her questions. “What were you wearing when you last saw them? Have you changed coats? Could they be in the washer?”

I looked in the car, under the seats, and in the yard where they walk toward their new ramp—a not-so-gentle slope that covers the concrete steps that have been so cruel in recent years.

She wanted her radio moved into the TV room. I looked for the keys. Then, in the living room, I spotted an errant purse hiding on the coat tree and with much trepidation reached inside and grabbed a set of keys with grocery tags attached. Frank and Joe Hardy never felt any greater accomplishment. But the look on her face when I produced them was not relief, but sadness and loss.

We drove to see my uncle—a wiry, thin man whose favorite question to me was always, “How much do you weigh now, Chris?” He always spoke with his teeth together, daring you to decipher him. We walked the wide hallway, led by my bloodhound of a mother, and we found Uncle Johnny sleeping in a wheelchair, the television tuned to a soap opera and Cheerios littering the floor. Like a slumbering chipmunk by the hickory nut tree.

I rubbed his shoulder as his breathing grew heavier. This was a man who used to take me bowling. He would catch minnows and fish with me at our ponds.

He awoke and looked straight up at my father and said, “Robert.” They touched each other, my father sat, and my mother introduced the stranger in the room. He repeated my name, then craned his neck to see me. I turned off the TV.

I awaited the pivotal question, but all he could say was my name. We stayed a few minutes, making one-sided conversation, then made our way to the front again. On the way home my mother asked if we could go to the mall and buy her some new slacks. She told me from the back seat which lane to get in, then which entrance to use.

I parked and rolled down the windows for my father. I know you aren’t supposed to leave little children in the car alone, or pets, but what about 90-year-old men?

I caught up with my mother inside and actually saw a friend I hadn’t seen in 30 years, not counting Facebook. My mother wanted me to say hello to an old classmate, Connie, who worked at this particular store. I didn’t know Connie well during our educational sojourn through the West Virginia education we both endured. She approached my mother from another department, tentative, unsure of what this might entail. Perhaps an irate customer?

“You went to school with my Chris, didn’t you?” my mother said.

“Yes, I did,” Connie said.

“Well, here he is.”

Connie looked up and smiled as my mother spoke of some accomplishment I had achieved. I remembered as a child her pride that I could talk “early.” Instead of just pointing and grunting at the Little Debbie Cakes, I could actually sound out “Oatmeal Cream Pie.”

Connie was kind and humored both my mother and me. Then we parted, finding my father still in the car.

The next morning my mother was concerned because all she could see on TV was cartoons. She needed a box of some sort from the cable company. This led me on a journey into the heart of darkness that is the world of cable, but I was more than willing to risk my life and dignity, facing the slings and arrows of this mysterious world.

I returned with 2 converter boxes to find my father alone, reading the paper in front of a strangely silent TV. I flicked the power button on the remote and found a full slate of channels. There had been an isolated outage in their area.

That afternoon we noticed it was getting a little chilly in the house. We discovered the gas was off, which set in motion another equally compelling adventure comparable to “The Lost Key Mystery.” My mother and father, barely ambulatory enough to navigate the new ramp, walked stiff legged toward an undulating field filled with unseen crevices, creeks, and gullies. Carrying a pipe wrench and a screwdriver, they led me to a pipe sticking out of the ground and proceeded to argue what would happen if I “blew the well.”

I will not go into detail here about what happened, but it was my mother’s tenacity in calling the drilling company and getting “Jerry” to drive the 60 miles to the farm that saved our lives from the bitter 45-degree temperatures and the sure explosion that would have followed if I had “blown the well.”

When I finally left them on Saturday night the hot water heater and furnace were working and the gas had returned. Game 3 of the World Series was history and it was time for me to leave. We hugged and kissed at the house on the knoll and as I drove away they flicked the light on and off, a signal I remembered from my youth. I carry that flickering light with me every day.

Uncle Willy

2010-11-05T08:35:00.001-07:00

My Uncle Willy was a hulk of a man, bigger than life itself. Tall and rotund, he walked with a sideways gait, as if the world were a listing ship and he was the one who was centered. We always looked forward to his visits because we knew we would laugh. He had the biggest laugh in the world. The biggest heart. A big appetite, too.

When we visited his home in Virginia (he had a blueprint business in Richmond), we would always play endless games of pool in his air-conditioned home. When Uncle Willy came to our place in the hills, it was late night games of Rook and dominoes punctuated with bodily noises and ribald stories. We laughed until midnight.

Uncle Willy had served in the Navy and liked his apple pie with cheese on top, something I could never understand. Still don’t, but then I’ve never been in the Navy. He loved bowling and smoked big cigars in the big car with leather seats he always drove.

Uncle Willy’s lap was a place of comfort and felt like home. As long as he didn’t take his shoes off, you were fine. I’m telling it like it is, not nice and neat and sugary sweet. His feet smelled like something that had been left beside the road. But it didn’t really matter. That was one thing I learned early, love covers a multitude of fungal problems.

There was a fair amount of rancor anytime he and Aunt Aileen came to visit because at some point the two of them would get into an argument. That’s when things really got interesting. I hardly ever heard my parents argue so it was a treat. Like Archie and Edith to a certain extent. Uncle Willy’s booming voice. Aunt Aileen’s alto whine. The argument crescendoed and then they’d make their way out to lawn chairs that were never the same afterward. Lightning bugs rose and whippoorwills called. And arguments faded.

Uncle Willy sang a song about “Tweedle O’Twil.” I guess it was an old Jim Reeves tune. I’d never heard it other than his version. I remember the line, “Sittin’ there wishin’, he could go fishin, over the hill, Tweedle O Twil.” Somehow that embodied my image of Uncle Willy.

And then the parting would come. Aunt Aileen’s eyes would grow red. Tears would stream. Hugs all around and then I’d watch their car disappear around the corner. The house always felt a lot quieter after their visits. More lonesome. Like some beautiful, ravaging storm had passed through and had left you different than before it came.

Aunt Aileen died many years ago, but Uncle Willy hung on and kept going. Today I got the news that the health problems that plagued him finally claimed his life. But death's cruel tug cannot take away the laughter I can still hear. I still feel the comfort of his embrace. The morning coffee on his breath. The sound of pins toppling from his powerful delivery.

I do not know why God favors some and not others. Why he blesses us with sunsets that shimmer all the colors of the rainbow while in other places the sky is gray. But I am grateful I can say I was one of the lucky few who had an Uncle Willy.

Update on Ellie, 11/5

2010-11-05T08:28:00.000-07:00

We asked you to pray for Ellie, our little friend who underwent brain surgery last month. Here's a recent progress report from her father, Peter. Please continue to pray for Ellie and her family.

Ellie has been exhibiting a ton more emotions. She's smiling, crying and a few days ago I could have sworn she laughed! Her dominant emotive has definitely been crying...she seems to cry often and for no apparent reason. However, she's home and we haven't been back to the hospital save for a check-up with Neuro-surgery (everything is looking good).

It's becoming apparent that Ellie is more 'aware' of herself and her
surroundings. She seems to respond more when she hears us talking or
moving around, she's more attuned to pain, and perhaps, she even knows
when she's hungry (still eating through the tube). She must have been in something like a deep, mental fog for the last year brought on by her seizures (she still hasn't had any since the night of the surgery).

She's 15 months old, now. We're praying that the seizures do stay at
bay, so that she will continue to develop all that she can do. We worry
about her future, which I suppose is normal for parents. People will
say, she'll be in God's hands, which is true. It is also true that she
has never been out of His hands from the moment she came into being, and
neither have we. And yet, in His hands we've been allowed to endure
(and survive) the most difficult, hellish year of our lives.

It's impossible to know what the future holds, but we are still hoping
for the best. We are certain that she has attained her current
progress, in large part, because of so many people's prayers--so many of
you. We have never been alone in this fight. You have all been
unswervingly faithful in lifting us up, a fact that is overwhelming.

Obviously, we never, ever wanted any of this for our children...this was
never factored into our dreams. However, since it has been and
continues to be our reality, we could not have 'dreamed' of being so
completely and repeatedly enveloped in prayer and generosity as we have
been. You have all been unbelievably good to us...it must be from God.

Thank you.

With much love,

Peter with Alana, Katie, and Ellie

Anita Lustrea

2010-10-25T07:30:00.001-07:00

If I had written the book, What Women Tell Me, the chapters would have been, “That shirt really doesn’t go with that tie,” “Turn over, you’re snoring again,” and the ever-popular, “Stop picking at your ear, Dad.”

One of the axioms of life is that God does not waste our pain. If we allow him to use our weaknesses, struggles, and disappointments, he will do that. He also uses our tragedies and the times in life when we feel like we’re lower than a snake’s belly.

I met Anita Lustrea in 1984, I think. She liked the Chicago Cubs and knew a lot about music. She was one of our first babysitters for our first child, Erin.

Before Anita hosted Midday Connection, she produced the program while Andrea hosted. One day Andrea came home after a particularly difficult program about husbands and wives. When I asked her how it went, she said that Anita had come into the studio afterward, shaken.

As I read Anita’s book, What Women Tell Me, that scene came back to me. I knew a little about what was going on, but I didn’t have any idea the depth of the pain Anita went through. I think a lot of people are going to be helped by her honest, frank, and open dialogue.

I’m glad Anita wrote this book. It was a long, arduous climb both in writing and in dealing with the pain. But I don’t think God is going to waste it. I believe he wants to use it in many lives.

To learn more about the book and what went into writing it, visit Anita's website.

Ellie Update, 10/20

2010-10-20T10:23:00.000-07:00

Thanks to those of you who have been praying for little Ellie. She is now home from the hospital! Here's the latest from her father, Peter. Please continue to pray for a complete recovery for Ellie.

Just wanted to quickly let everyone know that we got out of the hospital today. We've been settling in, relaxing a little. She's been ok, but she has been crying a decent bit, which is unusual for her.

Thank you so much for everyone's prayers. Ellie has survived major brain
surgery again, and hopefully will be better for it. She hasn't had a seizure since the night of the surgery. That was eight days ago, which is her longest stretch since April!

We're holding our breath.

Thank you all,

Peter with Alana, Katie, and Ellie

If You Could Live Anywhere

2010-10-18T09:54:00.005-07:00

If you could live anywhere, where would you live? Would it be in the mountains where the air is fresh and crisp every morning? Would it be beside the beach where you could walk in the sand and listen to the water lapping at the shoreline? Would it be somewhere in the mountains near a lake where you could fish all day and take long walks?

Some people are energized by the city. They love the lights and movement and the crush of people hurrying and scurrying about their busy little lives. Others want the solitude of a farm and to dig their hands into the earth.

I’ve been thinking about this question, particularly after a phone call I received today from a struggling writer who is, like me, not in the top tier of the publishing world. We can see the top tier because we look at the bestseller lists, but the dreams we had of writing “full time” have been just that, dreams. So we struggle and we hammer out words each day and we pray those words will somehow reach the intended audience.

He asked me, as someone who has been down the road further, some questions about how to approach his craft. I found the questions exhilarating and I spoke wisdom into his life. But he didn’t need the wise words as much as I did. Halfway through the conversation I realized that I needed to hear what I was saying more than he did.

Out of all the places in the world to live, I would not have chosen the desert. It’s hot. There are snakes and spiders. The cactus needles are sharp. It’s an unforgiving, inhospitable place to call home. I want deciduous trees. I want waterfalls. Instead, I have dust storms and tumbleweeds.

The more I thought about that, the image came to me of Jesus, hunched over a table and chair he was making in Nazareth. Dusty sandals and dirty feet. Dry and hot and not very hospitable. He left heaven for that. I don’t know how you picture heaven, but I don’t picture it like first century Israel. There was pain and death and human debris all around. A brutal government ruled. Liars and thieves populated the religious landscape. Prostitutes, beggars, lepers, the sick and hungry and lonely were all around. God gave up the comfort and bliss of heaven to come to that?

After the conversation with my friend, I again asked myself, “Where do you want to live?”

The answer came like a shout. Right here. Wherever God has placed me, with whatever duties he has assigned, with whatever people and problems that surround us. My desert reminds me that this is not all there is to life. If I were on an island, isolated from the pain and trouble in the world, I might be happy for a while, but I would not be serving where I am needed the most.

Where do I want to live? Lord, keep me from anything less than here and now.

Update on Ellie

2010-10-18T09:30:00.000-07:00

Many of you have been praying for a little girl named Ellie. Here's an encouraging update on her condition, received yesterday, 10/17. Thanks for continuing to remember Ellie and her family in your prayers.

Hello friends,

Wanted to give everyone a quick update on Ellie. She's making progress, slowly returning to her normal self (or how she was before the surgery). We transferred from ICU to the sixth floor last Tuesday.

She's moving her left side with same mobility as before the surgery, which is great. It's the side most effected by the disconnection of her right brain. Her head and faced swelled tremendously following surgery, (giving her a black eye) but it's gone down enough for her to open both of her eyes. Most of the week, she's seemed to be in pain (she rarely cries, but just acts agitated) and that seems to be improving as she's started to smile a little and play with her blanket and favorite bear. She was sleeping almost non-stop and was generally lethargic, but that's started to improve.

We may soon be discharged! However, there are a few issues that she's still dealing with that may affect when we'll be able to go.

Ellie wouldn't be as far along without everyone's prayers. Thank you so much, all of you, and a special thanks to those who've organized the prayer schedules. You've been incredible!

Peter with Alana, Katie, and Ellie

New Interview!

2010-10-14T15:51:00.000-07:00

There’s a new magazine out and I’m in the debut issue! Slap my face with jam and tie me to an anthill! I’m sure Karen Kingsbury is honored to share the spotlight for a few moments.

Click on the cover and go to Page 14 to read the interview and hear a bit more about the story of Almost Heaven. Thanks for your support!

Prayer for Ellie

2010-10-13T11:01:00.001-07:00

I mentioned on the program yesterday a little girl named Ellie and her family. She went through surgery yesterday. This family has been through the wringer. I believe Peter works with Campus Crusade. Here's an update from him and a picture of Ellie.

Hello friends,

I wanted to give you a quick update. As may have already heard, the doctor said Ellie's surgery went well yesterday, with no complications or surprises. Our subsequent excitement and relief was dampened a bit by a 20 minute seizure Ellie suffered at about 9:30 last night, followed immediately by a smaller seizure.

Our doctor said post-op seizures are 'not uncommon', and that it may be due to trauma from the surgery. There's a lot going on in her head right now, a lot of 'rewiring'. Hopefully, she won't get any more seizures. We're cautiously optimistic.

We are overwhelmed by how many people have been praying for us. How do you thank so many people in one simple email? It isn't remotely possible. Nonetheless, thank you.

We'll be at the hospital for another six to ten days, depending upon Ellie's progress.

With much love....

Day 40 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-10-10T00:01:00.000-07:00

For our final entry in the 40 Days of Prayer, I want you to read something from my friend, Robert Sutherland. I've appreciated his thoughts over the past few weeks. Here's his final entry.

Hi Chris,
Hope you are well, and the family.

Sorry about the latest discovery of mold. Don’t know what to say. Haven’t a clue what God is doing. Hate to drop a hit-and-run Bible bomb and say, “Don’t worry! God’s in control! And remember, God will use your pain to bless others. Gotta run! Buh-bye!”

One of my prayers for you is that God would kindly bring this season of pestilence in your family to a healthy end. And that all you have learned would benefit others.

* * * * * * * *

My daughter, Sarah, said something to me today that – as G. Campbell Morgan might say – arrested my thoughts.

She’s been praying for me to find a better job. Very kind of her.

Had a rough day at work today. Texted her about it, as compared to whined to her about it. Got an almost simultaneous reply: “Do you believe God will bring you a new job?”

As you know, the last thing any dad wants to do is discourage a beloved daughter – especially about spiritual truths.

Instead of simply saying “No,” I told her I believe God will work all things for my good, whether or not I lose my current job or God makes me the next Chris Fabry (without the mold, please).

I don’t recall the decade that I abandoned what I perceive to be the nonsense of “claiming” verses in order to persuade/intimidate God into doing my will, at the probable expense of receiving His perfect will.

I don’t recall the decade that I abandoned the certain nonsense of giving God suggestions as to how He could work things for my good – replete with step-by-step directions, helpful guidelines to follow and a timetable that would help Him keep me informed of His progress in accomplishing the tasks I set before Him, so I would not have to waste too much time blindly trusting Him.

I don’t recall the decade that my prayer life morphed into “Whatever, Lord.” No, not in the mega-Christian sense of absolute trust/faith/surrender. More along the lines of “I give up trying to figure out what to ask you to do.” Again, not with the most spiritual of attitudes. Not nihilistic hopelessness. Not angry frustration. Not a lack of faith that God really does answer my/our prayers.

More like, “Your ways are above my ways as the heavens are above the earth,” and I look forward to how you resolve the impossibilities I/we face in life.

(How DO people survive without God? It’s hard enough WITH His blessings?)

Sure, I ask for victory in battles with intransigent insurance companies, imperfect family members/coworkers/politicians and applying limited funds to my limitless needs/wants/desires.

Is it faith or foolishness to think I never have to pray again? That God loves me so much that He will accomplish good for me and through me to others whether or not I ever ask Him to?

At the risk of creating God in my image, my family – two wondrous daughters, two dedicated sons-in-law, two terrific grandsons and The Princess: my almost ten-year-old granddaughter – has taught me about the heart of God.

Primarily, no matter how much I love my family, He loves them more. My prayers for them? Mostly that God will express His love to them in convincing, gracious ways. No matter what.

Before my mom died a decade ago, few things made her as happy as a call from me or my girls. Our voices delighted her soul.

My dad will celebrate his 90th birthday on Christmas Eve. I call him at least three times a week. Does us both a world of good. We love to chat. About anything.

My daughter, Esther, vacillates between calling several times a day and calling every several days, but hearing her voice say, “Hi, Dad!” is the essence of joy.

The ringtone I use for the joyous calls from Sarah and The Princess is the voice of The Princess saying, “Grampa! Pick it up! It might be me!”

The Princess Ringtone

Perhaps only a parent or grandparent can fully understand how my heart leaps with joy when I hear my beloved grandchild’s voice at random times.

I don’t know how to put this, so bear with me.

I don’t care WHY my family calls me. The topics are far less important – even if the topics are VERY important – than the fact that they called me.

Contact with them revitalizes our relationship.

That’s where I am with prayer. I think/feel/believe God likes to hear the sound of my voice – even if the stuff I talk about with Him is comparatively insignificant compared to the “Lord, please save the life of my wife/husband/child/parent” prayers that ascend to the Lord every moment of every day from every corner of Earth.

Again, God is not a doting grandfather quick to overlook all our faults/sins/behavior. But He is delighted to hear us call upon Him in prayer. [See Proverbs 15:8]

Conversing with God is what I do … more than praying to/at God. Praying without ceasing is easier … as I habitually talk with God.

Back when such things mattered to me more, my “life verse” was that portion of I Samuel 7:12: “Thus far the Lord has helped us.”

I still believe that with all my heart.
You probably do too.

But it’s easy to forget.

Thank you, Chris, for all you and your team do to bless listeners country-wide and world-wide. You are a blessing. Thanks for letting me pitch in; very kind of you, brother.

God says to pray in secret. In spite of that, may I pray for you publicly, please?

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you for all the witnesses in the Old Testament who knew you so well that they said you are “compassionate and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in lovingkindness.”

Thank you for how Jesus is the perfect example of compassion, grace, patience and sacrificial love.

Please forgive our sins and deliver us from evil.

Please be gracious to us. Please direct our paths and please glorify yourself through us.

Lord, we ask you to provide for Chris and his family. Please bring healing to Andrea and the kids.

Please glorify yourself as you deliver them from all that afflicts them. Please.

Please restore the years that mold and illness have taken from them.

Please give Chris favor … strength … and wisdom as he seeks to honor You through his writing and on the radio.

I pray that you will bless more people than he can imagine through his new book.

Lord, I thank you for Moody Broadcasting, Chris, his teammates, the stations that air his program … and all the people who use dollars dedicated to you … to make it all happen.

Lord, I pray that what we’ve begun during these 40 Days of Prayer would become a habit that endures from generation to generation in our families.

Thank you that Jesus ever lives to make intercession for us.

Thank you for being delighted by our hearts and voices when we pray to you.

We love you, Lord.

Please forgive our unbelief.
And bless us, Lord.
For your glory and honor.

In Jesus’ name.

Amen

* * * * * * * *

Amen, Robert. Now let me turn the prayer back to you.

Father, thank you for the good heart you've given Robert. You've given him a lot of pain and heartache and difficulty. You know the struggle he had in loving his mom in her final days. You've seen his tears and his sins. And you love him even more than I do.

In your sovereign plan for his life, I pray you would give him an amazing week at his current job and renew his love for the people there. Prepare him for the next step. And providentially send a new task his way, a new job, or a redirection in the current one.

And give him peace in the midst of all of this. And joy. Don't bless him because he's the best Robert there is or because he is always kind, because he isn't. But he is your child and you love him. Show him the depth of your love today.

And for my other friends who have followed along, take the hurts, cares, difficulties and problems in life and turn them into something beautiful. Selfishly we would pray for all of that to be lifted, but we know it's there calling us closer to you, making us long for our eternal home.

Thank you for being who you are, Lord. We praise you for the gift you've given us in Jesus.

In his name we pray,
Amen.

Day 39 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-10-09T00:01:00.001-07:00

Thank you for going on this 40-day journey with us. Tomorrow, we’ll present one more blog from my friend, Robert. Today I want to encourage you to make a phone call or send a message at some point and let us know what God has been telling you over the past few weeks. Your perspective might encourage someone else. Our feedback number is 1 866 953-2279. Or you can email us at chrisfabrylive@moody.edu.

Joni Eareckson Tada joined us Friday and here’s a message we received after the program:

Chris and Joni--

I'll type quickly because my darling 18-yr-old daughter is waiting for a drink. She has cerebral palsy and epilepsy, doesn't walk, talk, or feed herself, and still wears diapers. Had you told me all this before her birth, I would have thought she would lead a miserable, empty life. Instead her frequent smiles gladden our hearts every day. Of course, we would grab hold of a cure if there were one, but she is a great blessing to our family just as she is.

Thank you for this show,

Susie

I’m grateful for Susie and the love she has for her daughter. Those with special needs are a great blessing to those who care for them. Yes, there are difficulties and it’s a lot of work, but no one embodies the verses we’ve been looking at more than the people who tirelessly care for those who can’t care for themselves.

Perhaps today you want to read Philippians 2:1-11 and think of it in a different way. In what way has someone else shown you the love of Christ? How have they put your needs before their own?

If you think of someone as you go through the verses, be sure to call them or tell them how you feel.

God bless you today.

cf

Day 38 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-10-08T00:01:00.002-07:00

As we near the end of the 40 Days of Prayer, here are more responses from those who have been journeying with us through this time.

1. I've been trying to journal, doing some catching up. Reviewing day 12 I looked back again to my first prayer...still a good one, but now I want a better look at Jesus, to know Him better. I say I love Him, follow him, put Him first, want to be with Him always, and I think I mean it and try to do what I say--but how well do I know Him? How well can I describe Him to others, know how to follow?

(I'm hoping the answers to those questions are more clear today for you.)

2. Chris, you are so right about the power of listening. When I was ill for so long and really nobody understood my pain and suffering, I had my husband who listened and comforted me and really didn't try to "fix it." He just listened and always prayed for me. These are things about him I will never forget. It really takes the love of Christ to become that kind of listener.

3. Thank you for mentioning the care of widows and orphans. I believe that we as Christians have really dropped the ball in this area. I never really gave it much thought until I became not only a widow but an orphan myself 10 months ago. Now I look at so many things differently.

4. God is amazing and the fact that he died for me and everyone else is amazing. This is one of the most amazing facts I have learned in my short journey in faith. Trust in the Lord and the day will be much better with him than without him.

5. Thank you for your points about attitude. I really needed that today. I'm struggling with my attitude toward my mother and my sister, who are not, I believe, saved. There have been continual lies the past year circulated about me and other members of the family, all since my Dad passed away. Negativity can be felt when you walk in the door of my sister's house. How do I keep my attitude right towards them when they are like this? I have prayed about the situation and given it to God, for Him to work out...not me, but I feel stuck right now with what to do while waiting for the answer! I guess I need to be like Jesus like you said...have His attitude and not mine. Thank you...you just answered my dilemma!

Now I want you to do something we haven't done. Read Philippians 2:1-11 and continue through verses 12 and 13.

Since we know that our salvation is a gift, what does "work out your salvation with fear and trembling" mean?

How does it make you feel that verse 13 says that God Himself is working in you?

Day 37 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-10-07T00:01:00.003-07:00

Thanks for going on this journey. I hope you feel like God has met you in some way here.

It’s time for some encouragement in prayer. It comes from my Facebook friend, Veronica. She tried to call in when we were discussing prayer stories but instead related it online. Here’s what she said:

When I was in college, I'd periodically spend a weekend with my Grandmother. Of course I always brought my laundry with me because it was free to wash at Grandma's.

One weekend I decided to leave the laundry behind so we could have more time to spend together and she wouldn't feel obligated to wash, dry & fold my mountain of clothes. Saturday evening she asked where my laundry was and I told her that I had left it at school.

She didn't say much but her facial expression and body language showed disappointment. When I inquired, she proceeded to explain that as she folded the clean clothes she prayed for me. When folding my socks, she'd ask the Lord to guide my feet; shirts she'd ask the Lord to protect my heart and help me to love Him and others more. When folding dress clothes, she'd pray for my studies and future. When folding undergarments she prayed for my purity and future husband/marriage. That day changed my life. I have no idea how many of these prayers were sent to the Lord on my behalf.

My Grandmother turned what is often viewed as a menial task into a time of prayer and blessing for her children and grandchildren. Who knew doing laundry could be the means of communion and conversation with the Lord?

Who knew, indeed. I take several things from this story. First, we can use any kind of task to draw us closer to God and to each other. God is there. He is worth spending time with. Prayer is powerful. Being faithful in prayer is such a gift to others. Remembering those who have prayed for us is a great gift as well.

Nothing is accomplished for God’s kingdom and his glory without prayer.

Nothing.

I’m so glad Veronica remembered her grandmother’s story. I saw on her Facebook status that she was cleaning her children’s room. How much you want to bet me she was praying for her kids as she cleaned up their toys?

Father, give me a vision for how much you want to draw me to yourself through prayer. Make me a person who not only folds laundry but prays for those who wear the clothes. Encourage us today through your steadfast love.

Day 36 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-10-06T00:01:00.002-07:00

I want to share some responses to these devotions today. Continue reading Philippians 2:1-11 and writing down your responses. Also look at Hebrews 12:1-2 and if you didn't hear our hour with Mike Boyle yesterday on the program, listen to that hour.

If you want to let us know how God is using this time of prayer and devotion in your life, please let us hear from you.

1. Chris, we sing this song in my church called "I Call Your Name" and it is a song of prayer. The words say, "I call your name; Lord, You reply. You bring your kingdom and stand by my side. Giver of life, more than I need. Father, you're everything that's precious to me! There is no one like you, Lord, in all the earth." Our 40 days together have caused me to see Jesus in new ways. Now that I have fixed my eyes on Him, I don't want to let go.

I just started a 10-week Beth Moore's study, "Jesus, the One and Only" this week so I can go deeper. As I magnify Him, my problems have become so small that I don't think they are even problems anymore. Thank you, NRB! Thank you, Chris! Thank you, LORD! God bless you!

2. When I think on Jesus, I think about Him coming down from the comforts of Heaven, leaving all that He knew. He was willing to die on the cross, shed His blood for me to cover my sin and give me eternal life. I have a heart of thanks and gratitude, for who am I?? Not worthy in my eyes but so precious in His. Yes, Jesus, the name above all names!!

3. Hi Chris, I love reading your friend, Robert's, letters. They are so real and personal and depict, I think, every person looking for God in some way or another. I wanted to reiterate what he said about God's grace and how awesome it is. Over the last couple weeks, even while I read your blogs, I still felt a sort of disconnect from God, and with that came a sense of "unbelonging" to the church I've been with for the past 2 years. I think hearing crickets when you ask God a question, makes you wonder if you're really going somewhere and if you have a purpose. This morning I was in one of those moods that all women have at one time or other and just didn't feel like going to church. I was mad, but I wasn't sure at what, I was distressed, but I didn't know why. In the end, I decided to go. I was so happy that I did! God encouraged me today big time! Last year my husband and I were blessed greatly by the IRS (yes, the IRS!) and I remember feeling that this gift from God was sooo undeserved. The week before, my pastor had talked about possibly sending some money to friends/missionaries in Tanzania to help them build a storage for their maize (corn), and when I was blessed, I decided, how could I not bless forward. So I sent a "monetary seed" to Tanzania to help them build their storage. Today I got to meet the missionaries in person! And I got to see what we helped build! It was wonderful! Not just to see how they were blessed, but to know that it was as if God was telling me, "You're going down the right path! Just keep fighting that good fight of Faith!" It certainly restored that sense of purpose back in my life that I couldn't see. Even in the small things that we do, God sees them. And I think that God could have just said that I was being a big baby and knew my role already and He wasn't going to assure me, but He did anyways. Because I realized, like Robert, that God is nice. And He loves us abundantly. I'm 28 years old and I'm in love with God more and more as I learn about His grace and goodness. My whole view of God has changed in the last 2 years and this in essence has shaped my actions and character greatly!

4. I was bound by smoking for a lot of years, I could not stop on my own. It was torture. I was ugly, frustrated, and so discouraged when I failed. It was one minute, one hour and one day at a time. My eyes had to stay on Jesus. I had to think it was possible for me to be a "non-smoker." It was hard on me and harder on my family. But God is so good and faithful.

5. Fixing my eyes on Jesus..... When I was so very ill with lyme disease six years ago, if my eyes were not fixed on Him, looking to Him, thinking on Him or talking to Him, my symptoms would overtake me even to the point of suicide. But as I have gone through the healing process over the years I have gained strength, know where to turn for comfort and have learned I can trust wholly on Jesus, secure in His love and grace to get me through anything. Yet I do know that each and every day until I die or til His return, that the only direction I want to place my eyes is on Him, the author and finisher of my faith!

I pray these words will encourage you today, for whatever climb you are on. God is there and he cares more than you can imagine. God bless you today.

Day 35 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-10-05T00:01:00.000-07:00

The only one who can exalt us is God. We can’t exalt ourselves. We can try, but we’ll always fail.

How does God exalt us? In ways we don’t expect. In ways we can’t understand.

In God’s economy, those who are “poor in spirit” are “blessed.” I’d rather have a big bank account, of course. But God’s blessings are so much more worth it than the temporal ones we can amass down here. Some of the most blessed people, some who have been exalted by God, don’t look like they’re exalted.

For example, look at Jesus. He didn’t look exalted at his birth. He didn’t look exalted when his family fled to Egypt. He didn’t look exalted taking the scourging and hanging on the cross. Yet, God says he has the name that is above every name.

If you humble yourself, God will exalt you in due time. If you are a servant, God will exalt you. He doesn’t explain HOW he will do that, but this is true. The first will be last and the last first. God sees all you’ve been through, sees all you’ve struggled with, and he knows your heart.

What are you doing today to exalt yourself? Stop. What are you doing to make sure you get on top of others? Stop. How are you striving/grasping after position and power? Stop. If you want to be great, serve. If you want to follow God wholeheartedly, humble yourself. Start with your family. Then your neighbors. (If you live near me, come pull my weeds.)

The most important thing you may do today probably won’t be in front of a lot of people. It will be what you choose to do alone, when you have the opportunity to serve, with no one looking, with nobody but God keeping an account.

God bless you as you serve in humility.

Day 34 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-10-04T00:01:00.001-07:00

It’s time to pull these last 34 days together as we head into our last week of prayer. I wanted to share some of the messages we’ve received in the past few weeks from people who are following in the journey. Take this as part of our uniting together—what Paul talks about in the first few verses of Philippians 2.

Some are from folks who are struggling. Others have met God in a fresh way through these verses. I’m grateful for all of the feedback. But I can’t seem to get this one off my mind. Warning: If you’re a parent, this one is difficult to get through.

“I lost a daughter to meningitis when she was 8 years old. The first night she was hospitalized she was in horrible and excruciating pain, and was not given any pain relievers so they could find out what was wrong. Because it wasn't known if she was contagious, only one person could be in the room with her and could not leave the room. I stayed with her and she cried and banged her head and bloodied her wrists and ankles because she was in restraints. She begged me to take her out of there. There is no way I can describe the anguish I went through or all that she went through. But the next day she 'died,' was resuscitated and kept on life support until she died 6 days later. Since I was the only one allowed with her, I have felt like that suffering was meant for me. I have come to terms with it somewhat, but I don't understand how a child could suffer like that, for what reason. I totally believe in God and the precious blood of Jesus. She did too, when she was sick, she would ask me to pray for her.”

What do you say to a mother who has been through this experience? What do you do to alleviate the pain? The memories? The anguish. Only that mother knows what truly went on in that room. That mother, her daughter, and God himself.

I think he was there. He didn’t rescue them in that time, but he walked through that with them. Sounds a little trite to say it that way, and it would be, if not for the cross. If not for the submission that Jesus went through to reconcile us and glorify God.

I don’t pretend to have any answers for this mother who lives with this pain. Somehow, I don’t think she needs answers. She needs us. She needs others who will enter into that pain and take a little of it from her shoulders.

Would you pray for this mom today?

And think of those you may meet today who seem hardened or bitter or angry. Whose bedside have they come from? What hurts in the past have they experienced that made them the way they are?

Pray for them, too.

Day 33 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-10-03T00:01:00.000-07:00

Robert Sutherland is back in touch … and sent another prayer blog. Wonder what he’s up to on this 33rd day of our 40 days of prayer?

Hi Chris. Hope you are well.

I know you want me to be honest with you. And I think you’re hoping that I’ll experience some epiphany … or a re-awakening … that will change my life and influence others at the same time. Me too. But that hasn’t happened. At least, not yet.

What has happened is this: I am far more aware of people who need and deserve prayer. Guys like the associate pastor of my church. His wife, Rebecca, is carrying their second child. Due in a few weeks. Doctors ran some kind of tests on Rebecca and the baby. There’s talk the child might have Down’s syndrome. These are dedicated, delightful people … who need prayer.

Then there’s the cashier at Wally World. In her 40s. Looks like she could run a marathon and bag groceries at the same time. Just had a heart attack. Her doctor said she shouldn’t lift more than three pounds … or endure stress. She needs prayer.

Met a man who pays $2,000 a month in child support and alimony. He doesn’t make enough anymore to maintain his obligation to his ex and their four kids. He’s going to tell his ex he can’t pay … and that she’ll have to get a job. If he doesn’t pay, he faces jail time. They need prayer. And they all need Jesus.

The wife of a friend is disabled. She needed to run an errand and drove herself. Wrecked the car. Ran into a ditch. They got the car fixed. Less than two weeks later, she needed to run an errand. Drove herself. Wrecked the car. Ran into a ditch. Again. She’s only 60 years old. He doesn’t know what to do. They need prayer.

Another friend had back surgery two weeks ago. It went well, thank God. He needs prayer for patience as he recovers.

Called another friend today. His son, Reuben, has Crone’s disease. Had surgery a few weeks ago. Reuben’s doing better. Not sure how to pray for them … except to praise God for the relief Reuben’s feeling.

Know of an unsaved man and woman who got a divorce after years in an unhappy marriage. They lived in the same home during what they called a “separation.” During that time both he and his wife dated other people. With the mother and daughter living in one part of the house and the father and son living in another part. Now, the man found someone else to marry. And on it goes. They need prayer.

Went for a two-day motorcycle ride in the Smoky Mountains not long ago. Rode a famous highway called “Deal’s Gap,” in Tennessee. 316 curves in 11 miles. Totally amazing. There’s a scenic overlook at the end of the road. We all stop there and talk about how much fun it was to scoot through the woods on such a twisty trail.

This time, it ended differently. A white pick-up truck with large tool boxes up and down both sides came racing down the road toward where we were all standing. Probably 20 of us. It looked like the truck lost its brakes because it didn’t slow down at all … tires screeching … the truck swerving from side to side.

The truck missed us all and zoomed into a tight turn 50 yards from us. We were surprised it didn’t crash.

A moment later a Tennessee State Trooper went by. No siren or blue lights, but obviously in pursuit of the truck.

Probably a half-mile from us, the truck crashed. Went off what I’d call a cliff … into the woods. The truck rolled and flipped and came to rest upside-down and facing in the direction from whence he came.

The truck had been stolen. The driver ran away into the woods.

But more people got away that day than just the driver. God spared dozens of people who could have been mowed down by a wacko whose only motivation was to run from the law. And probably God.

I wondered why God spared us … and the 100 or so bikes that are always on Deal’s Gap. And I wondered about all the families whose loved ones were not so fortunate.

I’ve been praying for the people left behind after husbands or wives … parents or children … neighbors or friends … were maimed or killed in one type of accident or another.

The same loving God who spared us loves them … as much or more than He loves those He spared on Tuesday.

My heart goes out to those who suffer that way. And I’m sorry. Somehow, I believe God grieves with them. And I know that death is worse for those left behind than for believers who suddenly find themselves in the presence of God.

So … I’m praying for the ones left behind. For comfort. Hope. Relief. And for the faith to forgive God for taking them too soon … or in such horrific ways.

God will be vindicated in the end. Either by meeting him face to face, or by believing that He is kind and good … compassionate and gracious … even when we don’t understand.

Anyway. That’s the stuff I’m praying about these days. Just wanted you to know.

Devotion Hayulp -- Day 32 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-10-02T00:33:00.001-07:00

I love that old commercial with Loretta Lynn--I think it was her, with her daughters, Patsy and Paggy (really Peggy, but pronounced Paggy) and the girls were in the kitchen saying, "I hayulped."

Here are some responses to the question of what helps you in your devotional life with prayer and Bible study:

Inna
‎1) I have a list, too. It's grouped in a form of: family (incl. extended), my church (incl., kids, teens, youth, families, ministers, intercessors, missionaries & ministries, incl. Chris Fabry & his show ;-), grieving families, singles. It takes me 30-50 min. to pray according to my list. I try to do it once a day; if I am too busy, I skip once in a while & pray for some of those crucial needs in my car. I update my list as needed. Some needs are crossed out with "Praise the Lord!"

2) I try to stay in touch with the people I am praying for. Their input adds fuel to my prayers. I remind my friends to pray for me, too; if I know that my friends are praying for me, I can't miss them, either.

3) I noticed that staying close with God adds a lot of fuel to my prayers. It's so natural to talk to God during the day & long for a meeting with Him on my knees... If I find myself doing something wrong, I repent right away. If I keep ignoring the Holy Spirit's convictions in my spirit, I notice that I lose the desire to pray. Then I revise myself and ask God to show me where I ignored His gentle voice...

Bobbie
I set the alarm on my watch to go off every hour during the day so I can meditate on scripture or say a short prayer.

Kathy
Thanks for your wonderful topics of discussion! Love the show! I made a bulletin board with pictures of those I pray for. I see it first thing in the morning and last thing at night and God often puts the spotlight on one for the day that I need to contact or send a note to let them know I'm praying. My pictures includes missionaries, the baby we support through Holt, family members, friends, etc. When prayers are answered, I replace the picture, such as when we moved to our new home, the picture came down and was replaced by pics of former neighbors so we won't forget them!!

Maria
When people request prayer from me through email, I don't put it off. I pray, emailing my prayer back to them while it's fresh in my mind and I don't forget.

Savina
I too have pictures of my four grandchildren and my daughters and their husband on my dresser mirror. First thing I see in the morning and last thing at night. I surrender and lift them to the Lord, for their lives and salvation.

Benilde
Your program has been a blessing to me, thanks for all that you do. May the Lord continue to guide and bless each person that is part of your program.

We are told to pray without ceasing, and the Lord has put in my heart the need to pray daily for the teenagers in our church. ... The youth Pastor gives me their names and any issues that need to be prayed for. I write them down on my computer's home page calendar as an "appointment" for the time when I get to work each morning.

I write one name per day, and the first thing I'll see each morning flashing on my screen will be that person’s name; this will turn my attention to stop and pray for him or her at that moment and throughout the day.

I also keep the same list with their prayer needs in my Bible as reminder during my devotional time. The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you.

I hope some of these thoughts will help you today as you continue this prayer journey. Have a wonderful weekend and tune in tomorrow. My friend Robert Sutherland will be back with another thought-provoking letter.
cf

Day 31 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-10-01T00:01:00.000-07:00

We had some great calls yesterday talking about the “how” of prayer and bible study. Everything from the “five finger” prayer principle to the ACTS approach (see below) to prayer journals. If you didn’t hear it, go to chrisfabrylive.org and click on yesterday’s program to hear.

One of the themes of the hour was how much we get out of WRITING DOWN our prayers. When you write things down, you have a record of what was going on in your life, your head, your heart. Some surprising things will come out when you’re just “in the zone” with God. You’re not trying to impress anyone. You’re not trying to be anything but real, which is something God values. Plus, later on when you go back, you can see how God answered your prayers. So I highly recommend this daily journaling. So if you haven’t begun that practice yet, I urge you to do it. Even if you’re one of those people who feels like it’s just not your thing to write stuff down, go ahead and do it.

Here’s part of an email that came after the program about prayer. I wonder if you can identify with it:

For two years I commuted before sun up forty minutes. It became a very holy time for me. I never turned on the radio or did anything but be with the Lord, and drive, of course. I used the acronym ACTS to structure this time: Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, Supplication - a plan I had heard of many times. The darkness helped me stay focused and forty minutes was always the perfect amount of time. Also, I was led to pray for each semi-trucker parked along the way at exits, probably catching a little sleep. Often I thought that I might be the only person who ever prayed for the safety, salvation, and life of some of those truckers.

I truly missed this time on weekends, school holidays, and in the summer, It always felt so right to get back to the routine, and so easy to have scheduled prayer time. I still miss it, since my life is now rearranged. It is the best memory of those two difficult years.

If you don’t have a regular time of prayer, schedule it. Show up. See what God does. And like we’ve been talking about on the program, begin the discipline of “listening” to God. Not just talking to him, but listening to him. Listening by reading scripture, being quiet before him, and asking him to speak.

We have ten days left in this time of prayer and “fixing our eyes on Jesus.” Let's make these the best ten days!

Read Philippians 2:1-11 again slowly. Listen to what God is telling you through this passage.

What changes do you want God to make in your life?

Do others see the humility, service to others, and love exhibited by Jesus?

Ask God to show you how to express that love to someone today.

And then, listen.

Prayer Ideas from 9/30

2010-09-30T12:57:00.001-07:00

Here are some ideas on prayer that came up during the program today:
1. Journal and list people who come to mind.
2. Write out her prayers. This has changed her prayer life.
3. LISTEN. (5 minutes of silence!)
4. 5 fingers. (See below)
5. What you do with your hands, pray for a missionary.
6. Prayer notebooks, with sections for different requests.
7. Monday-govt, police, Tuesday-work, families, Wed.-church family, Thursday-friends, Friday-family, Saturday-pastors, missionaries, Sunday-me.
8. Monthly calendar with families to pray for.

Hi Chris,

I just love your program and have contacted you often. I homeschool and this is an email that I got from my mom and shared it with my kids during one bible time. My eldest son, 16, was just reading over my shoulder and said he loves using this and it even helped him keep his focus while he was in bed last night. Love In Christ, Venera Beebe

This is so neat. I had never heard this before. This is beautiful - and it is surely worth making the 5 finger prayer a part of our lives.

1. Your thumb is nearest you. So begin your prayers by praying for those closest to you.. They are the easiest to remember. To pray for our loved ones is, as C. S. Lewis once said, a 'sweet duty.'

2. The next finger is the pointing finger. Pray for those who teach, instruct and heal. This includes teachers, doctors, and ministers. They need support and wisdom in pointing others in the right direction. Keep them in your prayers.

3. The next finger is the tallest finger. It reminds us of our leaders. Pray for the president, leaders in business and industry, and administrators. These people shape our nation and guide public opinion. They need God's guidance.

4. The fourth finger is our ring finger. Surprising to many is the fact that this is our weakest finger, as any piano teacher will testify. It should remind us to pray for those who are weak, in trouble or in pain. They need your prayers day and night. You cannot pray too much for them.

5. And lastly comes our little finger - the smallest finger of all, which is where we should place ourselves in relation to God and others. As the Bible says, 'The least shall be the greatest among you.' Your pinkie should remind you to pray for yourself. By the time you have prayed for the other four groups, your own needs will be put into proper perspective and you will be able to pray for yourself more effectively.

Day 30 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-30T00:01:00.001-07:00

Chip Ingram really encouraged us yesterday on Chris Fabry Live with some thoughts about the passage we’re studying. If you didn’t hear his comments, go to chrisfabrylive.org and click on Past Programs.

While you’re there, take a listen to Hour 1 and what Bill Watson had to say about the name of Jesus.

In fact, let’s consider that last portion of the passage. Here’s what it says:

9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.

What does the name of Jesus do to you? Have you become complacent about it or does the person of Christ move you? Knowing that on some day in the future, everyone alive and everyone who ever walked on the planet, and every entity ever created will acknowledge that Jesus is Lord changes the game. We’re on the winning side.

But I’ll be honest, most of the time I feel defeated. Most of the time I wonder if there’s really a purpose to what I’m doing. It feels like I’m flailing at life and the mountains overwhelm me.

All the more reason to fix our eyes on Jesus. If you didn’t hear Bill’s devotion in Hour 1, listen. It’s only about 6 minutes in length, but it really helped us focus on the meat of this passage.

How does the name of Jesus, the power of Jesus, the victory of Jesus, or the exaltation of Jesus make a difference in your life today?

Day 29 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-29T00:01:00.000-07:00

A quotation has been running around in my head for the past few days. This may be a good time to share it with you. Anne Morrow Lindbergh lost her son when he was kidnapped and died. I don’t know much about her spiritual journey, but what she says here hits home with me.

“I do not believe that sheer suffering teaches. If suffering alone taught, all the world would be wise, since everyone suffers. To suffering must be added mourning, understanding, patience, love, openness and the willingness to remain vulnerable.”

There’s a lot in there to unpack, but I think what she’s getting at is our search amidst the suffering. We can either view life fatalistically, as if we’re just pawns on the stage, or that we’re part of the play and our actions mean something. To learn from suffering, we must be actively involved in LIFE.

In the passage we’ve been studying the past 29 days, Philippians 2:1-11, I haven’t thought much about the vulnerability of Jesus. I don’t think of God as vulnerable. I think of him as omnipotent. Unable to be defeated. Yet, what Jesus did for us was divine vulnerability. He came to earth, gave a gift we didn’t deserve, and then let us make the choice whether we would spurn that gift or receive it.

God’s love and mercy were poured out for you and me. Christ humbled himself and suffered for us. But we have to engage our will in order to enter into that truth. And when we do, we become vulnerable. We fellowship in his sufferings. We identify with him and all he did for us.

Read the passage again today and ask God to make you vulnerable to his love, vulnerable to the suffering of others, and ask him to point you in the direction of loving others the way Jesus has loved you.

Prayer:

O Lord, I don’t want to be vulnerable. It hurts. I don’t want to suffer. It hurts. I don’t want to give love to those who spurn it. But you gave me an example. You died in my place. You gave yourself for people who don’t respond to you. Give me that kind of love for the people in my life today and help me share in the suffering vulnerability of Jesus. In his name, Amen.

Patrick's Prayer Card

2010-09-28T12:03:00.000-07:00

Day 28 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-28T00:01:00.004-07:00

If you didn't hear the interview with Pete Greig on Monday, listen to what God is doing through the 24/7 prayer movement. God seems to be moving, particularly through younger people and prayer, but God doesn't care how old you are.

Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name...

The humiliation of Jesus, his condescension, his submission to the will of God satisfied all of the law's demands. He paid the ultimate price and gave himself that you and I might come back into a relationship with God.

Therefore, the humility and service of Jesus was rewarded by God. When Jesus was baptized, God spoke and said that he was well-pleased with Jesus. By raising him from the dead, he put actions to those words.

Jesus is exalted to the highest place. What does that mean to you if you are "in Christ"?

Jesus has the name that is above all names. What does that mean to you as a follower of Jesus?

Jesus knows you. He knows your name. He knows everything you've ever done. In one sense, that makes me afraid. In another, I'm comforted. He came to deliver me from all the things I've ever done. His name brings freedom. It brings life.

Praise God for Jesus, the name above all names, today. Write down one attribute of Jesus that you appreciate and thank him today.

Day 27 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-27T00:01:00.000-07:00

I want to thank you for praying for our family. We feel it and appreciate it. I may be saying more about it on the program today. If you don’t get Hour 2 on your station, tune in for the live broadcast online or listen later to the stream or podcast.

Brandon and Colin were baptized this weekend in a horse trough at the front of church. We worship at a “Cowboy Church,” a gathering that goes to cowboys and their families and meets outside. It’s a really neat group of believers who don’t mind if we’re not cowboys or are chemically sensitive.

Watching this take place, seeing Colin and Brandon and two others be baptized, brought back the truth of the passage we’ve been studying. Jesus left heaven’s comfort and security and the fellowship he had there and came to this earth for little boys like Colin and Brandon. He didn’t grasp and hang onto heaven, instead, he brought heaven to earth and offered us an opportunity to know him and serve him by serving others.

His service to us allowed us open access to God’s love and mercy. When we’re going through tough struggles, when we don’t know where to turn next, when finances run out, when friends turn their back, He is always there.

As you read Philippians 2:1-11 again today, contemplate the length and breadth and depth of God’s love for you. Thank him for what he has done and is doing, even through the trial you are facing. Everyone is facing something. And God cares for you, friend. He showed that by giving of himself and loving us with all of his being.

Hallelujah, what a Savior!

Day 26 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-26T00:05:00.002-07:00

On this Sunday, I want to thank you for living out the Philippians 2 passage for my family and me. Many of you prayed and buoyed us with those prayers. I want to include three messages from Facebook that I received. This is truly God's people thinking more of others than themselves:

Marty wrote:
"Lord Jesus, enable my brother to endure and lead his family well through this time. Give them wisdom, clear decision paths that will give them confidence and comfort. This new issue will introduce the Fabry family to a whole new set of people. Give them stamina to endure and faithfulness to proclaim Your glory and gospel. Help those who meet them along this path to marvel at the depth of their faith and the greatness of their God. Amen"

Michelle wrote:
"Lord God, we come to you in the only name we know that can totally eradicate this situation in the lives of your servants. Our prayer is that if it takes supernatural awareness, supernatural understanding and a supernatural event that you would provide for this family deliverance from this annoyance. Lord in the meantime I pray for supernatural grace to abide with them while they deal with the matter. This prayer is in the Name of Jesus our Restorer."

Rebecca wrote:
"Oh Chris, I will pray for you all. I can't even imagine! I listen to Wretched radio, and Todd Friel says that sometimes we think the good at the end is what God is doing... When in fact the difficult time is the good, that he is working it & putting us through it & that that is the good. He says it much more eloquently than I can. When I start to worry about my own situation (not mold related) I sometimes have to say to myself, this is the good because it is from God. God bless you & I will pray!!"

Thanks to everyone who prayed and thanks for the continued prayer. God bless you today!
cf

Day 25 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-25T07:54:00.004-07:00

There are some days that defy description. Friday was one of those days for our family. We’ve been going through another mold battle. I won’t go into detail, but this one is serious. It’s more than a scare.

That this would happen now is unbelievable to me because it feels like warfare. And the enemy would like nothing better than to get us to run or get us to back down from what we’re doing.

I believe people are gaining freedom. I think people are leaning on God like never before. I know I am. Some of the projects I’ve worked on and am working on seem to me like things God wants to use in others’ lives.

Instead of backing down, we are going full speed ahead and we would appreciate your prayers. God is bigger than mold. God is bigger than the enemy who wants to thwart us. And God can answer our prayers. If you think of our family this weekend, we would appreciate your intercession. If we ever needed it in the last two years, it’s now. Thank you.

Today, I want to continue with an email from a friend of mine, Robert Sutherland. Here is what he wrote me recently about this 40 days of prayer. I pray his words will bless you today.

* * * * * * * *

Hi. Hope you are well.

God has been SO much like God to me the past few days.

I love him.

I had a bad week. My boss told me that I didn’t have the three-day weekend off, even though that was the deal. For the first time in years, I actually made plans to get away for a couple of days.

But, it didn’t take long to change my plans and change my attitude. I am thankful for my job, even when it’s inconvenient.

A couple of days later, I had to deal with deep-rooted unforgiveness I have toward another person. I totally failed. Expressed ungodly sentiments and – sorry – didn’t really care. Bitterness does that.

A Christian friend sent me a note and dropped a Bible bomb on me for what I said. No, “Hi, how are you?” or “Having a bad day?” Just a Bible verse to tell me I had been found guilty of shooting my mouth off and a copy of the Scripture verse to prove it was a sin.

I was wrong. A friend corrected me. The way s/he believed s/he should correct me. But it was so unlike God. In my humble opinion.

I say that because I have learned one thing about God in the past 35 years. It’s a biggie. Ready?

God is nice. So few people get that.

I sinned. Didn’t repent or confess it. Not sure I have even today. Did God whack me around until I realized that He loves me? Don’t laugh. That’s how we pray for God to straighten sinners out, isn’t it?

“Dear God,
My kid is on the wrong path. Please crush him/her and make him/her miserable until s/he realizes how much you love him/her.
Thanks.”

Know what God did for me the day I screwed up? He paid my mortgage from the most unexpected source ever: an unsaved friend. I helped my friend get a contract for his business. He gave me a $500 “finder’s fee,” totally out of the blue. Enough to pay my house payment. Told him I was just being a friend and that he didn’t owe me anything, but he absolutely insisted.

Amazing.

When I got back to the house, I looked at the check and I dropped to my knees – right there, all alone in my kitchen. I just could not believe how gracious God was being to me through my friend. But unbelief is the root of so many of my issues with God.

I didn’t tell you, but I’ve been doing battle with an insurance company that did me wrong. I paid a payment on time and had abundant proof they cashed my check … but this giant insurance conglomerate canceled the policy anyway. When I called to object, I just got the run-around. Their error was going to cost me thousands of dollars.

To make a long story short, I got a letter from the insurance company about an hour ago. Before I opened it, I prayed.

I confessed that I had no one to fight for me but God. The 28 pages of documentation I sent Goliath (and the copy delivered to my state’s insurance commissioner) presented my case, but I knew God was my only true hope. As the Proverb says, “The horse is prepared for battle, but victory belongs to the Lord.”

I opened the letter. Goliath apologized for the mistake and reinstated the policy.

Amazing.

God gave me victory. And I’m grateful. Told Him so in prayer.

So, that’s where I am today. A sinner … and a recipient of grace that far exceeds what I deserve. As is the case with all grace, I suppose.

As I pray now, I am almost silent before Him. Without a doubt, I am loved. Even when I don’t deserve it.

And I know … even though I am a man of unclean lips … there is a God who will provide for me … and who cares about me. He will forgive my sins … deliver me from evil … and prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.

And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

May I say something to your listeners and readers, please?

You cannot earn the love of God. Jesus did that for us and “it is finished.” Don’t give up on God, even if you think He’s given up on you. Make Psalm 23 your prayer. Or Psalm 34. Read it to God. Pour out your heart to Him.

And let Chris know how God works things out for you, OK?
Not *if* God works them out. WHEN God works them out.

Blessings to you … dear one, loved of God.

Day 24 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-24T00:01:00.004-07:00

I don’t like hunting for cars. Especially now that the whole family is chemically sensitive. We can’t have cloth seats because they retain odors and chemicals. Leather is expensive, but it works. It's not as porous. Most cars I find have residue of smoke or some cleaning agent that burns the eyes, contricts the throat or leaves a weird taste on the tongue.

I am searching for the unreachable car. To reach, the unreachable car...

Imagine how hard it is to find a God you can trust in. One that is the perfect fit for your psyche. Your temperament. A lot of people have found a god in themselves. They don’t believe in a deity—it’s in them. Or they follow a god that tells them how many times to pray each day and what to eat and when not to eat. Or maybe a god that makes them do unimaginable things to please him. That kind of god is available.

I haven’t been able to find God. That’s the honest truth. I would have looked all my life and never would have found him.

Instead, he found me.

Jesus, every bit God as the Father, didn’t stay in heaven, though he had every right. He let go of that position and humbled himself. Made himself a servant. As a man, he fully submitted himself to God’s will and made a way for you and me to be made holy. Perfect in him.

But it cost. A lot. His life. He had to die in order for me to be found.

It says in scripture that before the foundation of the world was created, the Lamb was slain. This was God’s plan. This was his search and rescue mission for you and me. Any one of us can be found because he made the way. He humbled himself, became nothing, became obedient to even the degradation of the cross.

If you’re looking for God, don’t look at the tree where he went to show his love. If you’re looking for God, don’t look at the tomb where his body was placed. If you’re looking for God, he is exalted to the highest place and has the name that is above every name. And he’s calling yours today. He wants you to come to him.

Read Philippians 2:1-11 and respond to him today. Write whatever comes to your mind—thanksgiving, praise, ask forgiveness, repent, or just consider the vast love of a God who won’t be found, because he finds you and me.

Who needs leather seats when you have all of that?

Day 23 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-23T00:01:00.002-07:00

Brian Kluth was on the program yesterday. We were going to have a conversation about generosity and finances and the economy. It turned into a conversation (two hours) about pain and how God uses it. Brian lost his wife on August 11th to cancer. Not the big “c,” according to Brian.

A caller told us that as she goes to sleep each night, she asks God to “take her.” She doesn’t want to live because of the pain of the past and present. Have you ever been there? Many have.

After the program, I received this email:

Dear Chris,
I was on my way home from work when I heard the caller. My heart went out to hear her pain. I know her pain and have lived it. I lived through abuse of all kinds from my grandparents, my mother, stepfathers and spouses. I ran just like she did from my pain thinking it would not bother me or that I continue to hold a grudge. I never fully realized that I continually kept that pain alive and kept up walls. I became a Christian 11 years ago. I thought that because Jesus saved me that all the past would in a way disappear. My past IS under the blood of Jesus but there was mending in me that He wanted to do. The Lord had to sort through all the horrible pain, insufferable things and mend my heart. I went to counseling with an organization called Freedom Ministries. It is intensive prayer, learning to let go of my high expectations, dealing with abandonment, fear, anything. I praise God that I went through the pain and was able to give it over to Jesus. The most amazing thing, I finally understood how much Jesus loves me. Even all the horrible choices I had made thinking that I had no others options. I can't express it fully but the feeling I get from her is “walls and isolation keep you in chains to the lies.” I know I have more mending. I guess I'm writing because I never realized how much Jesus loved me or how broken my heart really was. Just like her. We live in a mean world and I pray that she finds her way. I wish I could write more and explain better but I just can't put all my emotions into words. Just Lord help her and bless her.

I love that kind of prayer and that kind of realization. When we fix our eyes on Jesus, our pain doesn’t go away. The past is still there. But as we gaze upon Him, and as we focus on what he has made us, what he wants us to do, we’re able to get a better perspective of life. We’re enabled to be free.

Read Philippians 2:1-11 and focus on verse 8.

The ultimate obedient act that Jesus performed was to offer himself, to be obedient to death on a cross.

Jesus died for the events in your past that haunt you.

He died so that you wouldn’t have to pay the penalty for them.

Because of the obedience of Jesus, he purchased what you could never purchase on your own.

Have you ever prayed for God to “take you?”

Why do you think he didn’t? He could certainly take any of us as soon as we become believers.

What does God want you to do today in obedience to him?

How can you follow in the footsteps of obedience to Jesus?

Day 22 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-22T05:21:00.000-07:00

What does it mean to “Fix your eyes on Jesus?” That’s what we’re trying to do in these forty days. We’ve heard from an exotic dancer who listened to the message and said she didn’t want to do that any longer. Yesterday I received this message:

Mr. Fabry,
I became a stripper in Dallas Texas when I was 23. During that period in my life I lost everything and I mean everything. By the time Dallas was done with me I lost everything material, financial, relational, but most importantly I lost me and I thought I lost God. My dignity, integrity, honesty, and purity was gone. I was empty. The last night I was in a strip club working I was drunk. Stumbling around the club half dressed in high heel shoes crying my eyes out; a man, a woman, or a spirit walked by me very fast and I heard, "What's a girl like you doing in a place like this?" All of the sudden it was as if someone clapped their hands. I came out of a trance and thought, "What am I doing here?"

There are those moments of clarity, in the midst of the sin—just like the Prodigal Son experienced. “When he came to himself…” That’s what happened to the person in Dallas. That’s what happened to the dancer who phoned us the other day. She came into her right mind. Jesus will help you do that if you ask him, no matter what the situation.

A disease can cloud your mind, too. Here’s another response to the devotion we’ve been doing the past 22 days:

When I was so very ill with lyme disease six years ago, if my eyes were not fixed on Him, looking to Him, thinking on Him or talking to Him, my symptoms would overtake me even to the point of suicide. But as I have gone through the healing process over the years I have gained strength. I know where to turn for comfort and I have learned I can trust wholly on Jesus, secure in His love and grace to get me through anything. I know that every day until I die or until His return, the only direction I want to place my eyes is on Him, the author and finisher of my faith!

What a great way to express the submission we’ve been looking at in Philippians 2:1-11.

Read the passage once again. Focus on verses 5-8.

Jesus fully leaned on his Father and submitted himself to his Father’s will. He fixed his eyes on God at every turn. If Jesus needed to do that, how much more do you and I need to do that?

God wants to set you free. What is holding you back from fully submitting your life to him today? Is there anything in your life that you feel is making you stumble? Is there anything about your life that you would say, “What am I doing here?”

If so, confess that to God and accept his forgiveness, and get out of there. Flee whatever that is today and fix your gaze on Christ.

Prayer:
Father, take my prodigal heart and turn it toward yourself today. I submit my life, and everything that I have, to your perfect will. Use me as I present my body, my mind, my soul, my life to you. I want to be more like Jesus. Show me those areas, shine your light on the places I need to see, and help me submit them to you today. For Christ’s glory and for your Kingdom, Amen.

Day 21 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-21T00:01:00.002-07:00

God can set us free. The truth sets us free.

When Jesus stood in front of the synagogue one day, he read these words from Isaiah:
"The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to release the oppressed…"

I want to tell you what happened on the radio program yesterday. But first, I have to tell you what happened over the weekend. I knew we did not have a guest for hour 2 on Monday and in those situations I try to keep my eyes peeled. The scripture that kept coming was the scene of Peter walking on the water and losing sight of Jesus and then sinking.

I felt strongly we should talk about that and I wrote a brief devotion about it and posted it Monday morning. (You can read it below.) During the program I asked for calls from people who were looking at “wind” instead of Jesus. “What is your wind?” I asked.

Several people called about the obstacles they see in their lives. For one it’s infertility, another had a daughter with tumors, another was facing unemployment/underemployment. With a few minutes left I took an anonymous call. I called her “Ann” for short.

What transpired was something only God could orchestrate. Ann said that she was a single mom and in order to make money goes to a bar and dances. She said she’s tried to quit many times, but when the bills come due, she goes back to the bar. She doesn’t want to, but she does. Off the air she said when she heard us talking about the wind, she knew she had to call. She said she’d been asking God to help her get free from this.

She seemed hopeful when we spoke off the air and when I mentioned there would be people praying for her, she said, “Use my real name.” I was so proud of her. She wants you to pray for her and her daughter, as well as her roommate (who also wants to quit the exotic dancing) and her daughter.

So today, spend a few moments in prayer for Angelica and Priscilla, as well as Azalia and Jasmine. God wants to set the captives free. He longs for us to come to him and ask for things like this.

Today on the program, we’re going to link Angelica with a woman who used to be in the adult entertainment industry. And in the second hour we’re going to ask you, “How were you able to stop doing something you knew you had to quit?”

Whatever is holding you back today, God wants to meet you at that place. He wants to set you free.

Day 20 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-20T00:01:00.005-07:00

I hope you had a good weekend. Here were are, halfway through the 40 days of prayer. We’ve been trying to “fix our eyes on Jesus” during this time, studying Philippians 2:1-11.

If you didn’t read the blog over the weekend, go back and look at the post for Saturday. I think there’s a progression that God provides for us in order to help us humble ourselves and serve him with all our hearts.

I don’t know what you’re facing today. Is it a doctor’s diagnosis? Health problems? A wayward child? Unfulfilled desires? Dreams you feel have crashed and burned?

Don’t focus on the disappointments right now, focus on the person of Christ.

For today’s devotion, I want to take you to Matthew 14. Look at this scene in the life of Christ and his interaction with Peter.

22Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd. 23After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, 24but the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it.

25During the fourth watch of the night Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. 26When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. "It's a ghost," they said, and cried out in fear.

27But Jesus immediately said to them: "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid."

28"Lord, if it's you," Peter replied, "tell me to come to you on the water."

29"Come," he said.

Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. 30But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!"

31Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?"

32And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. 33Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, "Truly you are the Son of God."

What was Peter’s problem?

What was the answer to Peter’s problem?

What is your problem?

What is the answer to your problem?

Bring those things to God today and gaze at Jesus anew.

Day 19 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-19T00:01:00.006-07:00

My guest blogger today is my friend, Robert Sutherland. He’s had some ups and downs in life. If you go to my earlier posts from last week and the week before, you’ll see he’s written to me about prayer and how difficult it is.

We’re “fixing our eyes on Jesus” during these 40 days, and no matter what you’re going through, I think that helps anchor us to what is true. We can’t go wrong if we do that.

So as you read Robert’s update, think about what you’ve been reading in Philippians 2 and where you are on the prayer continuum, on the humility continuum, and on the submission scale. Those aren't real measurements, of course. Only God can weigh the heart.

And his heart is turned toward you today.

I hope you have a great Sunday. Here's Robert's entry.

* * * * * * * *

Hi Chris,

Hope you are well.

You’re not going to believe this! – OK. You are going to believe this.

Do you remember when I said my car’s “Check Engine” light came on when I visited my dad for the weekend? Well, I prayed about it.

On Sunday, I had to drive 150 miles through the countryside to get home. The light never came on! Three days later, it still hasn’t come back on.

Thank you, Jesus!! An answered prayer! Already!

It’s not as if I’ve never prayed before. I have. And I used to read and memorize the Bible too. But that was then. This is now.

I won’t play dumb and pretend I don’t know what made me wander off the prayer path. It usually happens when God disappoints us … or when we feel we’ve disappointed God. At least, that’s what happened with me.

May I speak for people like me for a moment, please? “WE” don’t want to talk to God about our bills, our bosses, our kids, our spouses OR Exes, our pains and our sorrows … because if we do … WE are afraid He’s going to tell us to become missionaries to people who live in smelly trash dumps. That happens, you know. It really does.

WE don’t pray for the same reason WE don’t sit down and take the time to write our last will and testament. WE are afraid of what will happen next.

Praying to God about my job is easy. Several times a week I am told that I am going to be fired if I don’t sell more widgets. But, I know there are a bazillion unemployed people who are praying to God … right this very minute … asking for work! I don’t want God to give my job to somebody else because I’m complaining. I want Him to make it right for ME!

But what if God doesn’t save my job … and INSTEAD … asks me to forgive you-know-who? Or be kinder to people – even while driving?

What if I’m asking for mortgage money and God asks me to tithe more? He does that sort of thing, you know. He really does.

My big problem with prayer has nothing to do with me asking God to make my life better. That’s fine. There’s always time to ask for stuff.

I just don’t want God to – how shall I put this? – ask ME to do stuff … like living the way the Bible says to do.

I mean God wants MY LIFE. ALL of it. That’s WAY more important to Him than my job or my bills.

And that’s scary.

It’s not that I don’t have the time to pray. The truth is: I don’t have the time to become a real, live Christian.

And prayer can do that to people. I’ve seen it happen!

I know what you’re going to say. You’re going to say “Pray about it.”

Right?

OK. I’ll pray about it.

But if I get sent to that trash dump, you’d better visit me.

Robert

Day 18 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-18T00:01:00.002-07:00

Read Philippians 2:5-8. For today’s devotion, I want you to follow me in three different versions of the Bible. Here is the text in all three versions.

KJV

Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus:
6Who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God:
7But made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men:
8And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross.

NAS

Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus,
6who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped,
7but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men.
8Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.

NIV

5Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
6Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
7but made himself nothing,
taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
8And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to death—
even death on a cross!

There is a progression in this passage I want to understand because I think God is showing us an important process. How do I humble myself? How do I have the mind of Christ? Is this something I can do myself? I believe God has to call us to do something as radical as this and give us the strength to do it.

Look at the three versions of this text. Each one of them tries to help us get our minds around what happened when God became a man, but still remained God. Jesus, fully God, part of the triune Godhead, stepped out of heaven’s glory and took on flesh and blood. There was no part of him that wasn’t still God, and no part of him that wasn’t fully human.

The first verb we encounter is one of “being.” I think of Moses and his encounter with God when the Lord said, “I am that I am.” The NAS says he “existed.” KJV says, “being in the form of God.” So the first step is to understand who God is, what his essence or being is.

The second step I see is that he did not hold fast to the station he rightfully owned. It is a volitional process of thinking/saying/acting counter to what he had a right to do. Jesus “did not consider equality with God something to be grasped.” He “thought it not robbery,” which is an interesting way to put it. Jesus was not robbing anyone by being God because he was God.

When you know your station, your place, who you are, and then don’t consider that station something you have to hang onto in order to stay who you are, there is great freedom there. He didn't have to prove to anyone anything about himself. The next step we encounter is Jesus “made himself nothing.” He “emptied himself.” He “made himself of no reputation.”

When you know who you are and have the humility not to have to “grasp” that privilege, you can take the next step of divesting yourself, emptying yourself. He made himself nothing, which led to him taking on the form of a servant, a slave.

Then, and this is the critical point in the process for you and me, he humbled himself and became obedient to the point of giving his life for you and me.

I don’t think you can skip any of the steps in that process and truly reach the humility that God wants for us. If we try to manufacture humility, we’ll fail and God won’t be glorified. We have to recognize who we are in Christ, that God is not just our maker, but also our Redeemer, and our Friend. We have access to the holy of holies because of the perfect sacrifice of Jesus. So we go boldly to the throne of God.

Having all these rights and privileges of now being in the family of God, adopted into his kingdom, we have to make the conscious decision not to “strut our stuff” in front of the world. We must not hold onto whatever prestige and position we might have attained, but empty ourselves and daily, make ourselves servants. You can’t truly humble yourself until you go through those steps. But when you do, you not only are able to humble yourself, but also be obedient to God, submitting yourself to his perfect will.

Then you will be able to truly glorify God. Isn’t that what we long to do as believers?

Where are you in this progression? Ask God to show you how to humble yourself and become obedient in whatever he has for you today.

If we understand this example that Jesus gave us, and if we ask to have this same mind, God will enable us to do that as we constantly think about this, contemplate it, and pray that he will do his perfect work in us.

Find the words to the hymn, When I Survey the Wondrous Cross. When we “examine closely” the cross, we understand that it's not just the incarnation that changed everything. It wasn't just God coming to earth that saved us. It was his sacrifice for us, his passion and love for us. Meditate on that cross today.

Gary and his brother, Deane

2010-09-17T12:24:00.000-07:00

Day 17 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-17T00:01:00.003-07:00

Dr. Rosalie de Rosset joined me on the radio yesterday and talked about baseball. I kidded her because she’s against sports metaphors. But the story she read about baseball cards and the “romance” of baseball is worth hearing if you didn’t. Go to chrisfabrylive.org and click on Past Programs.

One takeaway of the story was that we are to emulate Jesus in the same way a child looks up to a big league player. As a kid, I knew all of Pete Rose’s stats. Every year he had more than 200 hits. That’s why he’s still the all-time hit leader. But later, I learned that Pete didn’t live up to my admiration. He was a fallen hero, as all humans will turn out to be in some way or another.

You don’t have to worry about Jesus betting on a game or having a restraining order put on him. Jesus is perfection. That’s why the phrase, “made himself nothing,” keeps coming back to me.

Read Philippians 2:1-11 and concentrate on the phrase from verse 7: “taking the very nature of a servant…”

In what ways has Jesus served you?

How have you served others in the past week? Have you missed any opportunities?

What does it mean to you to know that God became a man to serve?

Write out a prayer thanking God for the way he demonstrated his love and ask him, if you mean it, to help you have that same nature of a servant.

(It’s a dangerous thing to ask God something and really mean it. He may give you an opportunity to serve someone today—like the one you might have missed in the past week. I encourage you to ask him and see what happens!)

Day 16 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-16T00:01:00.001-07:00

On Wednesday’s Chris Fabry Live, or CFL to the insiders, I spoke with Dr. Bev Hislop about living out the verses in Philippians 2 that talk about putting others' interests before your own.

She had something to say I felt really hit home and I’ve never really thought about it in this way. Her book is titled “Shepherding Women in Pain.” What is one component of reaching out to hurting women? Listening.

Hearing is a function of the human body. Listening is a function of the heart. You can hear a person but not really listen. You can spit back points in a sermon or a lecture without really knowing what you’re saying. Listening means you take yourself out of the equation, or decide not to “grasp” a really good point you could make.

How many times have I been talking with someone and have jumped on something they said because I had a really good idea, or I saw a movie like that, or I had a dog who died. There are times when I can share those things, but most of the time, if I will listen, I’ll put those things on the back burner, forget about figuring out what I’m going to say, and just listen.

Maybe, in these 40 days of prayer, God wants you to know he’s listening to you. He cares. He’s there in your pain. Maybe God wants to speak to you through these verses we’ve been studying.

Read Philippians 2:1-11 again. Slow down and read. Listen.

I put together an acrostic from the word, listen. This might be of some help, comfort, or encouragement today.

Love well
I must decrease
Speak encouragement
Talk about Jesus
Expect God to show up
Never give up

Day 15 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-15T00:01:00.004-07:00

I’ve assumed God’s will for me is to make smart investments and good financial decisions. I've tried to buy a house in a neighborhood that is relatively free of crime and has neighbors that mow their lawns and want to keep their cars inside a garage. I’ve assumed God wants to give me a house big enough for all my children who want to still live at home, plus, the wisdom when to make the nest uncomfortable so they can fly.

But I’m beginning to wonder if this is, indeed, the path God has chosen? Falling home prices will certainly rise at some point. The falling stock market will probably do the same. Unemployment has to get better. How do I position myself? Where do I invest? Where do I put my capital resources?

My assumption was always that I would put it in a home that would grow in value. I would give at my church, give to charity, and let the professionals care for the widows and orphans. They do such a better job than I can do. I’ll help friends and family, maybe, but you can’t solve all of the problems in the world. Right?

That’s why Phil 2 is hitting me hard. If Jesus had felt that way about you and me, would he have come? Would he have humbled himself? But, you say, he was God. Yes. BUT. Why does he call us to consider others better than ourselves and look after the interests of others? Why does he set the bar so high for his followers? What is he calling you and me to today other than investing in a house that we can sell for 30% more in ten years?

Isaiah 58 found me. I like this as a corollary to Philippians 2:1-11. It's not spoken to us today, it was given for specific people at a specific place in a specific time. But listen to these words and see if something doesn't ring in your soul:

Is this the kind of fast I have chosen,
only a day for a man to humble himself?
Is it only for bowing one's head like a reed
and for lying on sackcloth and ashes?
Is that what you call a fast,
a day acceptable to the LORD?

Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
and break every yoke?

Is it not to share your food with the hungry
and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—
when you see the naked, to clothe him,
and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?

Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness will go before you,
and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.

Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.
If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
with the pointing finger and malicious talk,

and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
and your night will become like the noonday.

The LORD will guide you always;
he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail.

Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins
and will raise up the age-old foundations;
you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls,
Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.

When Jesus stepped from heaven and became a man, he humbled himself, emptied himself, gave of himself, and clothed himself in humanity. Phil 2 says he did not "grasp" equality with God.

What does this say to you today? If we are to have the same attitude as that of Christ Jesus, what will this kind of living do to the world around us and the people who are desperate?

Day 14 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-14T00:01:00.001-07:00

Yesterday in hour 2 of Chris Fabry Live, we talked about “grasping.” In verse 6 of Philippians 2, we see that Jesus did not “consider equality with God something to be grasped.” If you didn’t hear that program you can go to the website and click on Past Programs. There was a caller named Larry right at the bottom of the hour. His story was heart-wrenching—a modern day Job. But there was such hope in his voice.

Here’s the rest of the story. Larry emailed me last night. Here’s what he said:

This is Larry from Nashville Tn. I was able to share some of my personal testimony on your program Monday the 13th of September. You mentioned that God really wanted me to share that day and here is some of the background information that you may not know. I am working on relating to God as the “lover of my soul” and try to be “naked” before him in my quiet time. I say, “Here I am and right now, I feel this way,” or, “God, this is the way I’m thinking right now, would you show me your path?”

This morning I was telling the Lord that I felt the need to share my testimony but I didn’t know how or where I would do it. “Lord, if you have put this on my heart you will have to open a venue, maybe a small group or something.” So today between stops I heard you speak about holding on and letting go. THIS IS SOMETHING I KNOW ABOUT. I dialed the phone. Two rings and your screener was on the line. After I had shared with her, she asked for my phone number and I gave her what I thought was my number. After I hung up I checked what I had given her and found that I had inverted two numbers (I don’t call myself very often) so I called back and after two rings I got through. Now normally this would never happen, I have tried to call before and couldn’t get through.

When I hung up I was hoping that I presented myself well and articulated my thoughts, however, looking at how this came together it appears to be one of those ”God things” as one of my friends likes to refer to it. Thank you so much for allowing me to share some of my journey. We may never know this side of glory how our Father was able to use a small interaction between two brothers talking over the backyard fence to minister to his body across the US or to that one desperate soul.

Amen, Larry. Thanks for sharing your heart. Again, if you did not hear his thoughts about “grasping,” listen to that section of the broadcast.

As you read Philippians 2:1-11 again, pay particular attention to what Paul asks us to let go of, what NOT to hold onto in our interactions with others. Then look at the pattern that Jesus gave for us. If there was ever anyone who had reason to “grasp,” it was Jesus. Yet he chose a different path.

What are you “grasping” today? Is there something you need to let go of in your life? Is there a way you need to submit to God today that you don’t really want to do? Ask him to help you right now.

God bless you.

Day 13 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-13T00:01:00.004-07:00

Happy Monday to you. I love Mondays. It always feels like the start of something new and fresh. God does that with our lives. The mistakes of the weekend can be wiped away by God's love and forgiveness.

We've been going through Philippians 2:1-11 and we're down to the 5th and 6th verses. I really want to concentrate on the 6th verse. Read the entire passage, then come back to verse 6.

5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
6 Who, being in very nature God...

We have a difference of opinion about Jesus with all other religions. They say he was a great prophet, a good teacher, a wonderful human being. But this verse points out the fact that Jesus was God. Not a "god," but God Himself.

Compare the first chapter of the gospel of John with this passage. What similarities do you see in what Paul states here about the person of Christ and what John says about him?

What other passages talk about the divinity of Jesus?

Did Jesus claim to be God? How would you answer that question by using scripture? If someone were to say today, "Jesus was a really good person, but he wasn't God," how would you answer?

Write out your thoughts about Jesus, who was fully God and fully man, and what his sacrifice means to you today.

Day 12 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-12T00:01:00.004-07:00

I hope you're having a good Sunday. And I hope this is a worshipful day for you. Here are some responses to our scripture reading and call for prayer. I'd love to hear from you if you have thoughts.

Dear Chris: As I review the scriptures I realize how much God has been with me through it all. I draw my strength from him and he has never let me down although I feel I have let him down; but I feel by just starting to read and review the bible more I am getting reconnected again. Thank you for what your ministry is doing for people like me that have lost their way a little bit, but want to be found. KaTreena

I'm excited to begin this process with you all today. Today is a great day to "fix our eyes on the Lord" maybe for the first time, or maybe for a fresh look! Thanks for all you do Chris, to encourage us in our walk and to inspire us everyday. Blessings always, love your show and your fam brother!

Thanks for suggesting reading the intro to the text. This is my take away: The immediate circumstances surrounding a believer are not the factors which should determine his attitude toward life. I think of the wittness I could be if I choose to live by this statement. This could completely transform the church. Mary

Thanks for those comments. Now, if you've been journaling, look back at the prayer you wrote early on our journey. Has that prayer changed at all? Have you seen God answer in any way?

Read Philippians 2:1-11 and worship God, thanking him for all he has done for you.

Have a great day.

Day 11 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-11T00:01:00.005-07:00

It's September 11th, in case you didn't remember. Just another date on the calendar before 9 years ago. Now it's more than a date. For anyone reliving those awful hours and days because you lost someone, our hearts go out to you.

* * * * * * * *

I received another note from my friend Robert Sutherland about our “40 Days of Prayer” and wanted to share it.

Hi Chris,

One thing is for sure: you have me *thinking* about prayer more. That’s a start. No, I haven’t hit my knees yet, but, I’m sure I will.

Spent the weekend with my dad. We had the dreaded “Dad, you’re getting too old to drive” talk. He’s almost 90 … and takes a ton of medication. It’s time for him to accept more rides from family and friends, or to take a cab when that’s not possible. It’s time for him to give up driving himself.

He doesn’t like that at all. And he’s a bit angry.

(pause)

I’ve been thinking about that passage in Philippians. It’s hard to treat others as more important than ourselves, in a case like this. We’re not trying to be mean. Dad’s a nice guy. He’s kind and lovable.

It’s true that I never could have forgiven Dad for leaving us when I was five … if it weren’t for Christ’s example of forgiving my sins.

But Dad won’t be with us forever. And we need to honor God by how we care for him. Even if it requires “tough love.”

(pause)

This is the precise moment where I always ask others to pray for me.
It’s been a long time since I’ve stopped to pray for things like this myself. It takes less time and effort to pawn that burden off on others. Besides, I believe God will answer the prayers of my godly friends. I’m far less certain about God answering mine.

That’s too bad. I used to pray all the time. And I remember how God answered them. Sometimes, in amazing ways.

Who knows? Maybe you’ll help me get back to that point, Chris.

* * * * * * * *

Well, I don’t know if I’ll have anything to do with it, Robert, but I know God will. And if it happens, the angels will probably throw a Robert party. I’d like to be there.

As you read through Philippians 2:1-11 today, don’t try to pick up anything profound. Just think of Robert’s dad, and Robert, and your other friends who need prayer. Lift them up. And if you think of something you’d like to ask God, go ahead. If you don’t feel like praying today, that’s okay, too. Groan if that's all you can do. God will understand. He loves you so much he came to die for you. He put our need for a Savior ahead of all of the other important things in the universe.

He humbled himself and became obedient. To death. On a cross. For you and me. Amazing, isn't it?

Nate McMillan's Grandmother

2010-09-10T07:03:00.000-07:00

I mentioned on the program yesterday that Tricia was going to see Nate's grandmother last night. Here is the update:

Nate McMillan's grandma, Lizetta Williams, passed away at age 94 just before midnight last night (Thursday). Official time of death was closer to 12:45am Friday. The burial (family and church) will be Saturday morning, and a memorial service on Sunday afternoon. All of Grandma's 6 kids are here, and the last ones to arrive got here just before she passed. She died peacefully, just stopped breathing, and is now fully restored in Heaven. We were able to see her for a few minutes yesterday when we got here.

Thanks for remembering the family in your prayers.

Day 10 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-10T00:01:00.003-07:00

“Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus…”

How many times as a kid did I hear something about my attitude? “Your attitude needs to change, young man.” “Your attitude really stinks!” “What’s with the attitude?”

How many times as a father have I said something about my children’s attitude? “Don’t give me that attitude.” “If you don’t change your attitude, I’ll change it for you!”

In the first few verses of Philippians 2, Paul sets the bar at an amazing height. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Consider others better than yourselves. This is impossible stuff. I might be able to do it for ten seconds, but to do that consistently?? Come on!

I know. I need to change my attitude.

So how do I do it?

Can I change my own attitude? Isn’t that kind of like crucifying myself? You can’t crucify yourself, you need help.

Exactly. We need help to change our attitude. But we play a part in the process.

Read Philippians 2:1-4 and look for ways you choose to follow the example of Jesus and ways that God works. For example, we can strive for unity but only God can give us the love that unites our hearts. Write your thoughts about this concept.

Now look at verse 5. The description of Jesus follows in verses 6-11, his history, his death, burial, and resurrection, and the effects of his humility and “emptying.” But stay with verse 5 for the rest of your time alone with God.

Ask him now to show you how you need to change your attitude. Is it with your spouse? Your children? Your parents? Your boss or co-workers? Maybe it’s your attitude toward God himself. Pray now and ask God to show you how your attitude needs to change. Then ask God to help you do that.

Father, I want to change. I want to be more like Jesus. I want you to be glorified in my life. But I need your work in my heart in order to do that. Help me make the choices necessary now to change my attitude. Do a work in me that makes me more like your Son. And help me today to see the effects of that in my relationships. And as I see my attitude change to one that is more like your Son, help me to remember this is your work in me so I might praise you. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Day 9 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-09T00:01:00.001-07:00

Thanks for going on this journey together. It’s a real treat to have you joining in prayer and studying the Bible. I hope this part of your day is something you look forward to.

I was preparing to interview Ravi Zacharias—he’s on in the second hour of Chris Fabry Live today (Thursday). If your station doesn’t take both hours, you can download the podcast or listen to the stream. At one point Ravi quotes the song made famous by George Beverly Shea, “I’d Rather Have Jesus.” The poem was written by Mrs. Rhea Miller. You know the thoughts and the melody. Now here’s the question the poem raises: Would you really rather have Jesus than riches? What about worldwide fame? Anything the world could give you, would you really rather have Jesus?

If you’ve ever lost anything dear to you, you know that Jesus makes the difference. When you lose everything and he’s all you have, you know how much you really have in Him. Don’t settle for anything less than Him today. Not counterfeits or things that will give you temporary happiness. Choose Jesus every day.

Now, let’s fix our eyes on Him. Read Philippians 2:1-11 once again.

Verse 4 talks about how we should live in a unified manner with each other in the body of Christ. Each of us should look not only to our own interests, but also to the interests of others.

How did Jesus do that in his earthly ministry? How did he pattern this lifestyle for his disciples?

Has anyone ever acted this way for you? A family member? A friend?
Think back over the past day. Was there an instance when you neglected to think of someone else’s interests and only concentrated on your own? Ask God to help you recognize that next time and change.

Spend a few minutes in meditation about this verse and pray for the people who come to your mind. This is one way you can look not just to your own interests but also to the interests of others.

Now a hard question. What person in your life is it most difficult to love right now? If that is a man and he likes football, ask him if he thinks the Saints or the Vikings are going to win tonight. But seriously, there’s probably someone you love who has wildly different interests—both interest in little things as well as life situations that may be hard for you to identify with. Can you enter into that other person’s world today in some way and show love by taking an interest in their life? Ask God to give you patience, creativity, and an open heart.

Father, my life is cluttered with interests in my own things. My mind is cluttered with my interests. You came to free me from selfish ambition. You came to free me from my sin. From myself. Help me not to be so consumed with all of MY STUFF that I can't get outside of that and listen, really listen to those around me. I open my heart to your leading and ask you to cultivate in me an interest in others. Help me fix my eyes on Jesus and the pattern he gave us with his selfless life.
In His name I pray. Amen.

Open Letter to Glenn Beck

2010-09-08T12:59:00.001-07:00

Dear Glenn,

This letter has changed a lot. It was meant for you and now I see it was meant for someone else. But first, let me say I like you a lot. I’ve attended your Fathom events in theaters. I love your humor, honesty, and that you get choked up. I love that you’ve struggled in life. We have a lot in common.

In my first try, I challenged you to do what you have called us to do, which is look at the truth. The whole “things may get worse before they get better when we search for truth” was something I wanted you to do. I don’t think you have done that with your faith, but now the emphasis of this letter has changed.

You see, the gathering at the Lincoln Memorial was such a microcosm to me of what’s wrong with me. With the church. The true body of Christ. What happened there has been a huge wake-up call because though what you called for was ambitious, it falls so far short of what God can do in us and through us. God has given us spiritual dynamite. It’s called the gospel. It’s the fact that Jesus, the Messiah, who was God in human flesh, fully human, fully divine, stepped out of heaven, made himself nothing, and became a servant, obedient even to the cross. His blood was given as the perfect sacrifice and it’s the only way you and I have to be made right with God. Because God rose him from the dead, we can have new life. We can live with the power he gives and not rely on our own.

Your rally showed me how much we try to reach for match sticks or firecrackers instead of the dynamite. And I don’t blame you for your efforts. In fact, I applaud your desire to have our nation move toward God and honor and charity, hope, and faith. But no matter how much steam the movement picks up, appeals to the civil religion can never have the power that God really intended.

God took 12 men who were unlearned, like yourself, and he turned the world upside down. It wasn’t through politics. It wasn’t through their persuasiveness. It wasn’t through their star power. And it wasn’t because they loved their country more than others. It wasn’t because they had a show on Fox. They turned the world upside down because of the message they had—that people can find freedom from their sin. They don’t have to be slaves to it anymore. They can have a relationship with God through the mediator, who is Christ Jesus.

I’m not angry at the black robes behind you. I think they believe they’re doing the right thing. But linking arms with and advancing a movement that is like a sparkler compared to an atomic bomb will only succeed in the short term. The gospel changes people for eternity.

If the Apostle Paul were to walk among us today I don’t think he would talk with you first. I think he would look at me, at Christians. He wouldn’t talk about the Constitution. He wouldn’t talk about the faith of George Washington. He would ask this: “What part of the resurrection don’t you get?” That event changed everything. It was a spiritual atomic bomb.

I’ll vote, I’ll work with my neighbors to stand for life, for truth, and feeding the hungry and clothing the poor. We are told to take care of widows and orphans. But Jesus also sent us out to proclaim the news that is powerful enough to change hearts from the inside out. That’s the only kind of change that will last. That is the fundamental change we need in our society, in our world.

So I’ve come to see that my problems with you and your beliefs are not really why I’m so passionate about this subject. I thought it was about the unequal yoking of believers with those who don’t believe. I thought it was your calling for us to return to whatever God we choose that was my biggest problem. But as it turns out, and as it always does, it’s my heart that needs to turn the right way.

John 17:3 says “And this is life eternal, to know Thee, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom Thou hast sent.” Paul says in Romans 1:16, “I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth…”

I believe God wants a revival in the hearts of his people. And I think he wants to do more than restore honor for the short term. And that’s not going to happen unless His people repent, turn from lesser pursuits, and get right with him.

Thanks Glenn, for making this clearer to me. And I pray you will come to know and understand the truth about who God really is and how great his love was and is for you.

Sincerely,
Chris Fabry

Day 8 of 40 Days of Prayer

2010-09-08T00:01:00.003-07:00

We spent the program yesterday talking about marriage. Bob Moeller joined us and there were some heart-wrenching calls and emails from women (mostly) who were at the end of their proverbial ropes with their husbands. I know it’s not just women who are hurting. Many men have wayward wives as well.

I’d like to go back to verse 3 again and fit this into my relationships again. I think there’s something God wants to bore into our souls about this and I’m not ready to leave it.

This evening I had a disagreement with my wife and it stemmed from my lack of communication. The very thing we were talking about during the program. My wife wanted me to wait for her before going for a walk, or at least communicate where I was going. This happens to me a lot. I like to blame it on the fact that I’m preoccupied. I’m working on a book. My right brain is taking over. I'm busy.

It’s easy to WANT to do everything from pure motives, being considerate of others, and thinking not just about yourself but putting others’ needs before your own. It’s another thing to accomplish that.

Did you have any situations that came up yesterday where you had the opportunity to put Philippians 2:3 into practice?

How did you do? Did you fail, succeed, or was it a mixture?

Read Philippians 2:1-11 again. Focus again on verse three.

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.”

What is the “selfish ambition” you struggle with the most? Some interpret this only as the person who wants to be “up front,” who has to have the lead part in the choir. But there are other ways selfish ambition rears its ugly head. More subtle ways. And they manifest themselves relationally.

What do you think would happen if everyone were able to follow these verses and actually put them into practice? What would happen to marriages? Families? Churches? Classrooms? How would politics be turned upside down?

I’m convinced God wants to transform our relationships, and he’s doing that in small, incremental ways. Give God your ambition today. Tell him what you think would fulfill your life and give you purpose.

Psalm 37:4 says, “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.” Could this be the opposite of “selfish ambition?” Could delighting in God and what he desires (which will provide our ultimate fulfillment) be the antidote to our own selfish ambition? When we delight in Him, this changes our perspective not only on ourselves, but also on all the relationships around us.

Prayer: Ask God to reveal any selfish ambition in your life and supplant that with a delight in Him. Write this prayer out to God.