The Flog – The Fabry Log

I wrote about fences last weekend, nostalgic for some reason about our house. I didn’t realize why, but I do now. Today is the 9th anniversary of our move to Colorado. Each year we would have some kind of celebration, going out to eat or having a cookout. One year it snowed on June 9, believe it or not.

It was a momentous thing moving from Bolingbrook, Illinois to the promised land of Monument, Colorado. It was a shedding of the old and looking toward the new. It was open vistas, the west, a new baseball and football team to cheer for, new friends, new neighbors, a much bigger house, and the promise of good things.

Looking back, I can see the truth about it. I can see the ways the house took life from us rather than gave it to us. It wasn’t the mortgage or the upkeep that drained us, it was the poor construction hiding behind those nice walls and the resultant water damage that caused us to get sicker and sicker, slowly sapping our health.

The children were so young nine years ago. Erin was 15. Brandon wasn’t even born. They say it all goes so fast, that you’ll turn around and the kids will be grown. They are more than right. It’s a blur. Those nine years are a whirlwind of activity and school functions and plays and performances.

I received an email yesterday from a mother wondering about her house and her children who are sick. Her questions point out the struggle I had when first confronted with the mold problem. Here is some of her letter.

“Hi Chris,
My husband and I are in a house that has mold in the basement, a little in our son's closet, and we suspect there may be mold in one of the walls in the living room. My children and I are ALWAYS sick with sinus stuff. We went away for a weekend trip to MI, everyone seemed to get better, we came back and everyone was stuffy again. My biggest concern is the wall. We have absolutely no savings and I have heard it can cost anywhere from $1,000 to $8,000 to fix it. So I have no clue how we would pay for it. We do not want to go into any more debt, ya know? Then I keep thinking that if they do go into the wall and there is mold, we probably should be out of the house during that process, is that correct? I am just so overwhelmed by all of this. I am just scared that if they open up the wall and find stuff that it will cost a fortune…

I identify with the angst in her email. The first reaction I had when Andrea suggested the mold was a bigger problem than we realized was to push it away. It’s like a sweater unraveling. If you pull that thread there is no way to stop it.

However, in my response to her, I gave advice that is much easier said than done. I told her knowing the truth is always best. Yes, it may cost thousands of dollars to fix. It may mean you must abandon the house in the process. It may mean you have to give the house up altogether. I wrote her back and said:

I totally understand what you are saying. You don't know how many times I tried to wish away our problem. The key is, no matter what your financial situation, no matter what has to be done to the house, find out the truth. Here's what you know. You're sick when you're in the house. When you get out you feel better. That's a huge heads up and your children's health could be compromised if you stay.

Andrea recently wrote on her blog what to do if you suspect mold. You can go to http://moldrecovery.blogspot.com/ to find out more.

Last night we walked Colin down to a neighbor’s house where he pulled weeds. He made $6 and you would have thought he had won the lottery. Kaitlyn and Brandon caught a horned frog and made a terrarium out of an old box. I can't remember what they named him, but they were out there until after dark watching him. It felt like a normal night, watching Kaitlyn run back and forth in jeans we just bought that she is outgrowing. Kids doing kid things.

As we walked back home, Andrea looked at me and her voice cracked. “This is the first time in so long that I actually went a whole day feeling good. I had energy and didn’t have to take a nap in the middle of the day. It lets me know how bad I was feeling.”

We’ve only been out of the house since October. We’ve been going through an intense detox that does weird things to our bodies. The toxins are leaving. We are getting better. Slowly, yes, but we are getting better.

Andrea leafed through a couple of books from the library after we got home. A few minutes later she looked at me with eyes betraying some kind of exposure. Just looking through a book that has had some mold or chemical exposure brings a reaction. She had to go to bed.

I wish we had connected the dots long before this. But we did connect them. It took almost nine years, but we finally discovered the truth. That's something to celebrate.